Wallflower

waiting

"hey Zac, how's your brother doing?" asked one of his friend named Leo. "He's okay i guess?" answered Zac, unsure with his own answer. "He still doesn't wanna socialize with people?" "Nah, he likes being alone. Just, let him be." ever since i heard their conversation about Jonah, i tried to be friends with Leo and i finally told him that i had a feeling for Jonah. Leo didn't say much about Jonah, he told me that he didn't know much about him but he could be a good listener for me and that he would help. I was thinking about telling Leo things that happened to Jonah that related to drug usage but i don't think that Leo knows about it so i changed my mind. I told Leo about things that Jonah always said, the "You're better off without me" and "I'm no good for you, stay away from me" thing and Leo said that Jonah IS like that and will STAY like that. He said that i have to accept his flaws no matter what because that's what makes him, him-- you know?

i wanted to visit him but i didn't have the courage to do that since he pushed me away. i was holding a cup of hot coffee and spacing out of the window, looking right at Jonah's house. How calm it was, because he never left. But then suddenly i saw Zac knocking at Jonah's door. He waited for a minute then the door opened. I saw Jonah, with an oversized blue T-Shirt and a black jeans. His hair grew a bit longer and he got skinnier. My heart went cray as i closed the curtains of the window so that he couldn't see me staring. I waited for a while then i opened the curtains back, and i went blank again, waiting for Zac to came out so that i could see Jonah again. I was feeling really hopeless, i couldn't do anything except waiting for him to greet me first. I didn't want to annoy him, I didn't want to make him feel uncomfortable and leave.

Zac left the house about 2 hours later and i didn't get to see Jonah because he didn't even showed himself outside.