It was an arranged mistake

Mum

The man who was my father was now gone forever. He would never come back now. Never again will I see his smile as he came home from work tired but smiling nevertheless acting as though he was all right like he just went out for a walk. Never again will he praise my cooking or Nazneen's art. He won't make Ruby motivate her to do better. Never would we look forward for the weekends where he would make us his special weekend breakfast with items that each of us liked individually. Never will we be able to ask his advice when we needed help or tell him about our problems and get reassured that everything will be fine. Never....

I was still hugging him when someone put a hand on my shoulder.

"Get up Shirin." Mr Yoonus said but I didn't move I didn't want to leave him. I wanted to savor this last physical contact that we had when he was still alive. Still alive.....

Mr Yoonus lifted me away from dad. The tears blurred my vision and I couldn't see anything properly. I was crying for what felt like hours.

I heard hurried footsteps coming closer.

"Your sisters are coming Shirin" he said, his voice soft.

I turned and saw Nazneen and Ruby running towards us. My vision was still blurred but I got up with shaking knees and went towards them. I was still crying when Nazneen opened my arms and engulfed me in a hug. I started crying to my hearts content. Ruby joined us and the three of us were enveloped in each other's arms trying to make sense of our loss.

I let go and they went towards dad, hugged him and started to cry. I couldn't handle being here anymore and I wanted to leave. I then remembered about mum and panicked again. What if she too....

"Where is mum?" I asked Mr Yoonus in a shaky voice.

"Uhmm.. she is in the ICU too" he said hesitatingly. Oh Allah! I backed away.

"She wasn't wearing her seatbelt and got hurt on the head." He said.

"Is she all right?" Ruby asked. She too was shaking due to crying. This is the first time I saw her so weak.

"She will recover but we don't know how fast. She is in coma as of now." he said looking at us. Oh no.. Please Allah save her. We just lost dad not mum too. We won't be able to bear it.

"Can we go see her?" I asked him trying to calm myself down.

"I think so but she won't understand anything as the doctor's had said. She is an unconscious state" he replied, "but you can go one at a time".

"I will go first." I said and hurried out of the room.

"She is in the room two doors right from here" I heard Mr Yoonus say.

I opened the door slowly and slipped inside trying not to make any noise. It wa similar to dad's room but the heart beat showed a steadier rate then what dad's was. She too was lying on the bed with tubes attached to her hand and an oxygen mask on her face.

She looked so peaceful without any concern for what happened here just now. How will she react after she comes to know about dad? She will break down. She can't handle this now. She need not know it yet. It's better we keep it away from her till she recovers.

I went and sat beside her taking her hand in mine and gently squeezing it to let her know I am here. I know the doctor said she won't hear anything. But what if she does? What if she can hear everything but won't be able to reply. I have heard of cases like this so better take precautions then let anything bad happen.

I wiped away my tears and cleared my throat. I had to say something.

"Assalam alaikum mum" I said softly, "How are you feeling? You look fine except that it looks as though you are in a deep sleep."

I gulped, "Get well soon mum. Me, Nazneen and Ruby need you. You have to get up you understand. For your daughters, for dad. you can do this. You are strong and we know that. You have to fight this sleep. And don't worry about dad, we will take care of him until you get better. So don't worry about him for now. He is feeling better now I am sure. Just wants you to be well and moving again. He is in the next room but don't worry he is fine. At least I think he is now..."

I couldn't say anything anymore. My throat felt choky and I tried to stop the sound of sobbing by putting my hand on my mouth. But the sound is hard to stop. I have to leave her before she starts to doubt.

"I need to go to the washroom now" I said and hurried out of the room.

"Miss Shirin-" the doctor started to say but I ignored and ran past him. I need to be alone. I can't face anyone like this. Not in such a pitiful condition.

I ran to the nearest washroom and closed the door and stood with my back facing the door. I burst into a fit of tears again until it felt as though it was not tears but blood coming out of my eyes. This is too much for me to handle. So many emotions at the same time. I am sad that dad's no more, upset that mum won't get up, afraid if she will ever be able to and most of all guilty that this all happened because of me. No matter what dad said I am responsible for this. For putting my parents in this state.

I went near the basin and turned on the tap. I splashed cold water on my face, hoping it will help me think straight. I closed the tap and looked at my self in the mirror.

I could see a girl with bloodshot eyes with tears running down her face, messy hijab and wrinkled dress. A girl who looked broken and didn't know what to do. I did not know what to do. All this in a day, no just half day. I lost the person I loved the most and on the edge of loosing the other one.

I tried to wipe the tears away. This isn't me. I am not this week. I need to be strong. Strong for me, strong for mum and strong for my sisters. Strong for my family. Crying won't help. It will just show that I am weak or maybe it will show that I have been strong for too long.

I need to get a grip on myself, I have to. I can't let all what mum and dad taught be on facing difficulty go to waste. I remembered dad's words, "No one makes a lock without a key so Allah won't give us problems without solutions."

"Shirin-" I heard Nazneen knock on the door. I turned to open the door and now I will have to face my sister's who lost their dad because of me.

.............................

AN: Just a quick update for you lovelies :D. Because you guys motivated me to update sooner. How was it guys? do tell me okay?

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Till next time,

-fox27808 :D