Young Dreamer

Young Dreamer >> Seven

^Christian Le'anne Carson^

"Yo! Wassup New York!" Jordan screamed with a goofy ass smile on his face as he walked into first period late.

I put my head down on the table as everyone's eyes landed on me. He must be high.

"Jordan! Shut the fuck up!"

"Language Ms. Carson," Mr. West warned.

What the fuck ever, I thought as Jordan took a seat next to me. I placed his hands in my face and looked into his eyes; high as a kite. I could easily smell weed coming off his clothing as he laid his head on my shoulder.

"Jojo, you okay?" I ask running my stiletto nails over his fresh fade.

He shook his head no. I kissed his head and laid my head on top of his, trying my best to pay attention to the notes.

"Everything is fucked up, Christian." Jordan complained as we sat at lunch.

"What's the matter, boo? Everything okay at home?"

"Nah, it's my dad."

"Doesn't your dad have lung cancer?" I ask concerned.

"Yeah," he sighed, laying his head on my lap. "He went in for a surgery about a week ago for them to remove some cancer cells, and he was straight for a few days. He was released from the hospital and everything. Then a few days ago, he was checked into the hospital again for coughing up blood. They ran some tests and shit, now he's sitting in the hospital on life support. They said he isn't making any progress and if things don't start looking up, our next choice is hospice."

I sighed, not knowing what to say. "Wh-, Jordan, I don't know what to say. Just know I'm here for you through whatever." I kissed his forehead.

"That's all I want to know." He sighed.

"I know I should practice what I preach, but have you ever considered praying for you father?"

I didn't mean for him to pray right here on the spot, but he did. He folded his hands together and began praying for the health and strength of his father

"Dear God, it's me. J-jordan Carter. Uh, I know you haven't heard from me in a while and I apologize. God, I know you see what's going on down here with my father and I just pray that you please, please, please bless him with the strength to remain alive. I need him here with me, God. I don't know what I would do without him here, to be honest. I just wouldn't be right." He sighed as two tears escaped his eyes. "God, if you bless my father, I promise, I'll try my hardest to get my shit- I mean stuff together. Just please, God. Amen."

Listening to Jordan pray for his father left me with a few tears in my eyes. You can tell that he meant every word and that he really loved his father alot. I remember when I was like that with my father. I quickly shook the thoughts from my head.

"Are you gonna be okay Jordan?" I ask laying my head across his back.

"I don't even know. I just need him to be okay." He bounced his leg up and down and pulled his hood over his head.

"You know it's okay to cry, Jordan." I whispered. "God knows what he's doing, I promise. You haven't seen your best days, yet."

"How do you know so much ? Like, how are you so wise?" He asked looking into my eyes. His were blood-shot red. Even Stevie Wonder could see that he'd been crying.

"Experience. I've been through thing that are unimaginable. Things that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy." I answer.

I still haven't told Jordan a damn thing about my past, and I plan on keeping it that way for a while. I like to keep to myself and stay reserved. I keep things bottled up, because that's just how I am. I don't let people in easily. Or at all for that matter.

"You wanna talk about it?" He questioned.

"No. I just wanna make sure you're okay. Are you gonna sign out?"

"Nah, I can't go home and see my mom and brother like that. Mom's probably pulling her hair out right now." He shook his head. "I'll find somewhere for tonight. One of these hoes will sneak my through the back door or something."

I closed my eyes and sighed. "Or you could sleep at my house."

He scrunched up his face. "Your parents out of town or something?"

"I live alone." I spoke swiftly.

He nodded. "You sure it's not a problem? I can find somewhere, Christian. I'll be good."

"I want you to." I smiled weakly. "Ain't that what bestfriends are for?"

The rest of the day breezed by for me, but for Jordan, I'm pretty sure it dragged. At the end of the day, I trailed Jordan to his house so he could get whatever he needed for how ever many days he needed to stay with me, then we went to a small diner to eat amd finally to my house.

We smoked once together and that was it. Jordan laid his head in my chest, holding onto my waist as he cried all night. I couldn't think of anything to say that would make him feel better, so I just held him.

"God only picks the most beautiful flowers, Jojo." I whispsered into his hair, kissing it.

^Jordan Isaac Carter^

Life is fucked up, man. Everything is fucked up in life right now.

My fucking father is on his death bed right now and I can't do anything about it. Nothing even matters now. The only reason I got in the game to begin with is to help my father stay alive and breathing and to help my mother pay the bills. Now that my father is in the position he's in now, what do I do?

I know that I should be home to comfort my mother, but how is me moping around going help her feel better. I love my mom, and it would kill me to see her like that. I need to get myself together before I can comfort the next person.

I really hope Jaecob doesn't get out there and do anything stupid. I try my hardest to keep him in school and away from the life I live. I have umpteen people out for my head right now, and I don't need that stress on me having to worry about his life too.

I hope this prayer shit makes a difference, because I don't know what I'd do without my father.

Having somebody like Christian in my life is a blessing, I guess. Lord knows where I would've been tonight. I've only known her for a short amount of time, but the time I'm spending with her is really changing me for the better.

I honestly think I'm beginning to feel something more than just like for Christian. It's scary as hell, but I can't stop it. Over and over again. I've tried to get it under control, but I just can't. Christian is still oblivious as to what I do for a living and I don't want to pull her into this kind of lifestyle.

I know if I were to tell Christian about what I do, that she wouldn't judge me. But just like I can't worry about Jaecob being in danger, I can't worry about Christian either. Even though everybody I associate myself with is in danger one way or another, I don't need that right now. I'm under enough stress.

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Aww, poor Jojo. I know I neglected this story, but I'm back. :D

8+ detailed comments guise (:

And don't forget to check out my new Chris Brown fanfic called "Perfectly Imperfect". Kay? K.