it makes me sad, looking back at what we used to be. we really weren't anything though, were we? it hurts, that we weren't anything, because you hurt me so goddamn much, it makes me feel pretty pathetic. i must be pretty weak to have been hurt so much by "nothing".
and it really was nothing. you did nothing wrong. you weren't obligated to talk to me or care for me or love me. but you did. it was your choice. but was it really?
was i the one that messaged you first? was i the one that started to care first? was i the one who told you i loved you first? did i initiate all of this? is this all my fault?
we exist through texts on a screen and pixelated words. you can't feel my tears, and i can't see your smile. have i ever heard your voice through a phone? have you ever heard mine? it feels like we're in entirely different galaxies, when in reality, one phone call is all it takes.
but you wouldn't answer. you never liked phone calls.
~
nothing but pixels holds us together, when we could be killed by the weight of a feather. who knew that you with words soft as a petal, could shatter my heart that i closed up with metal.
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a/n: now that I reread this i realize it could be the start of a lowkey angsty 2009 phanfic oops.
appreciate my rhyming skills
