George Washington Fanfiction

Le?

The British have kidnapped me.

They're forcing me to drink tea and eat fish and chips.

It can't get much worse than this, folks.

The British found me when I hit the quan. I mean, I didn't even see it. I, being the Saint I am, would never hit and run, and plus, I ran out of gas, so I decided to see if the quan was still alive AND BAM. Redcoats.

So yeah, I'm stuck here in the British camp.

That's not even the worst of my problems.

I'm trying to escape right now.

I slipped a "happy little pill" into the guard's tea, and he's asleep. I tiptoed past him, almost to the door now, but in walked IDRIS FRICKIN ELDRA AND BENEDICT FRACKIN CUMBERBATCH.

I KNOW RIGHT.

So, I started combusting internally.

"Not so fast love," Benedict said in a British accent so British I could hear every SuperWhoLockian's ovaries exploding all over the world.

"Britain's got a few tricks up its sleeve," Idris said. I squinted at them.

"I knew this day would come. I saw it in my future. I knew, I knew I'd have to fight you in the ultimate battle for America." I struck a fighting stance, and I stood a fighting chance.

"What do you think we are? Savages?" Benedict exclaimed.

"We'll have a rap battle of course!" Idris exclaimed.

"Yes, but..." I trailed off. "Next chapter."