Pain ( Darkmore series #2)

Memory - Leo

Jordan is gone. I guess it doesn't kill all of us, only the one who screws up. I knew he'd be gone. I knew he'd mess up. But I still let it happen. I guess it's partly my fault. His clothes were on the ground, only his blood remaining, no body or bones. Dust also remained, but not much. Aaron told me it represented his soul and emotions. I didn't have much of a reaction to learn he was gone. My throat tightened as if to cry, but I find myself unable to.

She'll remember me, she did when I told her to remember me, she has to remember.

Alex was on the floor, Aaron said she'd wake up sooner or later, so she lays in my bed. When she appeared, Aaron and the other girls wrapped tons of blankets over her to cover her nude body. Now that's all she has over her, layers and layers of blankets. I haven't really gone anywhere else, no one has. We all wait in the room in silence for her to wake up. Carmel and Makayla went for a walk, thankfully Carmel offered to join Makayla. Alex's cold hand is resting in mine, I wonder if it'll ever be warm again. Colin rubs my back, reassuring me she'll wake up, and that I should go downstairs for a break. I feel like the only one who gives a shit about Alex. 

I can't read Colin's thoughts. Maybe he's simply not thinking anything, if that's possible. Suddenly, Alex shoots out of bed, gasping for hair and coughing. The blankets stay over her chest, I rub her back, patting it and letting her get that first breath of air. My heart races, now that she's awake and breathing and living when it feels like I saw her die just moments ago. Her skin is warmer now suddenly, and it feels strange touching someones bare back. When she finally stops coughing and patting her chest, she looks at me, pushing my hand away and backing into the wall, covering herself up with the blankets to her neck.  

"Who . . . are you?" Alex asked panicked, She looks at me, then scatters her eyes to look at everyone, her eyes the same. "Where the hell am I?"

I can't feel anything. My body feels numb, worthless, trash that should've been thrown out nineteen years ago. My fingers twitch to move. There's a lump growing at the back of my throat that I force myself to bring back. I keep my head down, and I notice a tear that ran down my cheek, I didn't realize I was crying. Stupid. I rub my eyes, take a deep breath, and lift my head up.  I'm glad Alex is okay. Thank God.   

It has to be temporary memory loss. I tell myself. "Do you remember anyone in here?" I ask. I swallow the lump in my throat. She looks at me strangely for a moment, her hazel eyes look brighter than the sun. Beautiful.

She looks at Colin, saying nothing. Then Aaron, which I'm sure she would've said something if she knew her. My eyes soften, searching her as she continues to look at everyone. Shaking her head. "What're your names? And I want some answers." She demands sharply, stern, and I almost laugh. I've never heard her talk in that kind of tone.

Still temporary. "Leo, Leo Moonend. Remembering now?" I ask hopeful. I introduce everyone, including the ones she's never met like Rose. 

"I have no idea who the hell you are." Her words pierced me like ice. "Any of you, for that matter." Even Colin, She glares at me, then at Rose. "I feel like I'm not remembering something . . ." She observes me more closely and asks. "What's your name again?"

"Leo," I say slowly, hoping to spark her memory. I try not to push anything, she'll remember inevitably. 

"Leo . . ." She repeats. She looks at Colin. "Do you know him?" 

"Do you remember how you and I met, Alex?" Colin asks. He kneels down. She looks at the ceiling for a moment, then shakes her head. Me and Colin exchange worried glances. "What's the last thing you remember doing?"

She does the same thing. "I-I don't . . . know." She has that shy voice again as if she's unsure of what to say, whether she should say it or not. "I want to go home, just please hand me some clothes and I'll be off."