The Fall Out Angel (A Fall Out Boy ~ Patrick Stump FanFiction)

19. Patrick's P.O.V.

"I don't want to hear it, Stump. Just go." She said and I think that's one of the worse things I heard she said, but of course, I deserved it...I deserved it all.

I walked out of Rusty's house with a heavy heart, I don't want to leave her most especially right now that her life is in danger. I'm scared for her and with all this guilt inside me, I just need everything to clear out between us, but that's next to impossible right now. I understand her being like that, to be honest, I'll also feel like that if I am in her situation.

I decided to drive home and I'm glad that I didn't bump my car into something. I'm so angry at myself, I can now hear everything that I told Riley...the way I blame it all on her, the way I accused her, the way I easily ignored her. I never realized that I was doing that before and I can't believe that I've done all of those things.

I sighed heavily and pulled over in front of my house. I angrily walked out, slammed the car door and walked inside my house.

"Patrick. I'm so glad you're okay." I saw Joyce waiting for me inside and I think its really not the right time to talk...but that's too later now.

"Why?" I said to her with a gritted teeth.

"Patrick, I s-swear I didn't know about those chemicals. I will never do that to you!" She said in defense. "I already talked to her and I already told her that I didn't do that! I swear." She added. I somehow saw a mark around her neck like she had been strangled and I think I know who did that.

"You didn't even know?" I asked her, still angry.

"No. I told you, I got that perfume from a fan of yours. I told you that the moment I gave you it, I don't know...I swear!" She said and I just sighed at her.

Now that I came to think of it, she did really say that...maybe it's one of those people. They just really want to ruin us.

"Fine, but Joyce, this is not the time to talk. I'm a mess, I don't know anymore and what happened to us the other n-night...it was all blur to me and I don't --

"That's why I'm here! I'm here to help you and that night, of course, that meant something, right? Y-you still love me, right?" She asked me. "That's the same reason why you chose me over her!" She continued.

"I did! Yes, I did chose you before and I'll always will, but Joyce...that was before, things right now is now different. You changed...I changed and I think that we're not --

"Is it because you pity her? Patrick don't misunderstand pity with love!" She said hysterically and I sighed at her.

"It's not like that. It's always been her, I just didn't realize what I was doing wrong, and by that I mean, I didn't learn something from our song...that last years' wishes will be this year's apologies. I've always wanted you, Joyce, I always do, but again things has changed. I was too blinded by that want to have you and that was my mistake and I'm sorry." I frankly told her and she just silently cried in front of me. Of course, I know this will be hard on both of us, but really, this is not the right time to talk.

"Y-you're right. I-I'm sorry." she told me trying to wipe her tears. "I didn't think about what I was saying, it's just all too sudden for me." she added.

"I know, Joyce and things have been complicated with me and her and there are so many things happening inside my mind and among the band, but don't blame it all on those. You can blame me if you want to, it's just that I think both of us will not work anymore." I told her honestly and she simply smiled sadly at me.