Broken Souls {l.f. + r.m.}

Different

R I L E Y

History class, of course, was a drag. I knew all that this Balmer guy was talking about. For most of the period, I watched mystery boy. He was lost. Somehow. He was sitting right next to me, but he was 5 million miles away. I stared into his deep green eyes. I could see his emotions there. Anger. Confusion. Passion. Rage. He was unlike anyone I had ever seen. He was different.

What are you doing? You idiot. He's not into you. He doesn't know you.

Gently, I subconsciously changed the subject. I thought of my family. My room. My new life here. We had moved here because of my parents. They had both gotten jobs here. They wanted to settle down somewhere. California. I was born and raised a New Yorker. Rudeness coursed through my vains.

I don't know how to act here. How can I express myself when I don't even know who I truly am?

My parents say that we moved here because they wanted to "settle down".  I know why we really moved here though. Elliot. My brother. On December 11, 2011, Elliot Matthews was driving by himself in Chinatown. Out of nowhere, a truck hit him. That day, he and my parents had the biggest fight I had ever seen. Elliot told our parents that he didn't want to go to college. He told them that he wanted to go backpacking through Europe. He wanted to live. Of course, my parents, being their absolute selfs, told Elliot that they were not going to let him. One thing lead to another and before I knew it, Elliot was gone. Forever. Every second of every day I remember him. I remember how close we were. I wish I had tried to stop him. My parents regret all that happened on that day. Our family never truly recovered. Elliot wasn't just my brother. He was my best friend. I could talk to him about anything. He was my confidant, my mentor, my steady rock. He was. My parents didn't want to "settle down". They wanted a fresh start. They wanted a world where they didn't have to regret everything. They wanted a world where no one knew. Before I knew it, a tear ran down my cheek. Then another. It's been years since I had lost him. Years. No matter how long its been, I will never forget. I will never get over him. The days around his death are murky memories for me. His funeral. So many people came. They came to see my brother, but they never did. Elliot's body was never found. The people said that he couldn't be found. I had lost him even more. The worst part of losing my brother was knowing that he would never come back. He would never annoy or tease me again. I cried some more.

Stop. Right now. Riley Matthews. Stop.

I looked over at dream boy. He was even deeper in thought than me. My dreams of him. I had dreamt of me falling and him catching me. Crazy. When he walked in, he seemed to have recognized me or something. He couldn't get him eyes off of me.

Maybe it's cause I'm hot?  Nah.

Suddenly the bell rang. Joy. I swiftly walked over and told him to meet me at lunch. We had some talking to do.

[Hey losers :p. I really hope you are enjoying this so far. You should watch out on Lucas's past. Some of it may just come and bite him back. xoxo]