work experience ~ s.w

eleven

"You can let yourself fall you know" he assures me. "I know you think you shouldn't and that you have to focus your energy on Zach but you can actually do something for yourself once in a while."

"I can't" I shake my head. "Everything I do is to give that little boy a fighting chance in life. I shouldn't be selfish."

"Not if you're with me" he tells me. "You know I like Zach. And I like you. I don't know what I was thinking with telling you I'm with a girl but I'm ready for whatever this turns into."

"Sam. Zach's my number one priority. He's all I care about. I can't leave him like that."

"So you don't care about yourself? About your happiness?"

"I want to be happy Sam. You make me happy." I look to the ground. Sam tilts my face up with his index finger. He pulls my face closer to his.

"Vi" I hear Zach's croaky voice. I pull myself away and look over at my brother. Tears spill out of his eyes as he crashes to the ground. I shoot over to him quicker than the speed of light.

"Zach! Can you hear me?" I say loudly as Sam appears beside me.

"Move out the way" He tells me. Tears pour down my cheeks as I flop to the side. What's wrong with him? This is my fault. I wasn't paying attention to him. I should have watched him instead of letting my feelings get in the way. Sam picks my little brother up easily in his arms. "Get my keys" He instructs me. I dig my hand into his jean pocket and retrieve his keys to his car. I untie my apron and leave it on the counter as the chef waves me goodbye as if to say 'just go'.

I follow Sam out to his car and sit in the back seat with Zach's head in my lap as he stays unconscious. Sam drives carefully but speedily to the nearest hospital, rushing the both of us inside.

"Help us please!" I yell as we enter the A&E. Sam carries Zach in his arms behind me. A few nurses rush to our aid, shoving us through the big doors out of the waiting room.

"What happened?"

"He just collapsed" I shake my head. "I don't know what happened. You have to make him better."

"What's his name? Age?"

"Zach Harper and he's 9" I tell the main nurse.

"Any parents? Relatives?"

"No parents. Just me, I'm his sister" I say as the remaining nurses carry Zach out of sight on a stretcher.

"And who's this?" She asks looking at Sam.

"I'm a fri-"

"He's my boyfriend" I blurt. I know how hospitals work- only family or close relatives allowed. I take his hand for moral support.

"Ok well the both of you should take a seat in the family waiting room and I'll come get you when I have more news"

"Thank you" I splutter through the tears. The nurse walks away as I collapse into Sam's arms. He leads me to the waiting room as we sit down beside each other. I rest my head on Sam's shoulder. "If I lose him-"

"Don't talk like that. You won't lose him."

"I'll have nothing Sam. Absolutely nothing." I cry into my hands, trying to wipe the tears away before they have a chance to touch my skin.

"You don't need to think like that Viola."

"I love him with all my heart." I cry. If I lose him then the last 5 years will have been for nothing. Mom will be so disappointed in me. She'll turn in her grave and the horrible person I've become. If I can't even look after my own brother how am I supposed to care for anyone else?

"I know you do baby" He rests his head on my own. I close my eyes slightly but then jolt awake. I shouldn't rest while Zach is in pain. "Sleep Viola. I'll let you know if anything happens."

"You don't have to stay Sam." I lift my head from him. I feel bad enough that he had to come apologise for something that was my fault but now this? Sam really is my guardian angel.

"Yes I do. I care about the both of you If anything happens to that little boy I'll make sure it gets fixed." Sam smiles. "I'm here for the long run Vi" He says. I can't help but smile at his words. He reaches up and wipes my drying tears with the lad of his thumb. I lean over and kiss him on the cheek, touching the slight corner of his lips before resting my head on his shoulder once again.

***

"Viola wake up" I hear Sam's soft voice waking me up from my soft sleep. I jolt awake looking at the double doors before me.

"What? Where's Zach?" I exclaim taking no time at all to figure out where I am. The torment of the night before has been playing on my mind repetitively.

"They're preparing him for surgery."

"Surgery?" I exclaim. "Why didn't you wake me?"

"All they said was that they're prepping him for surgery. That's it. They'll come back with more information soon."

"My little brother is going in for surgery. Surgery for what? What's wrong with him?" I blurt. "This is all my fault"

"It's not your fault Vi"

"How do you know that?" I sigh. "How do you know that there was nothing j could have done? If I was with him then I would have seen it. I would have known something was wrong."

"But you were too busy with me. So if you're looking for someone to blame then choose me. Don't beat yourself up for something you didn't do."

"I'm not going to blame you Sam. You're my rock. You're the only reason I'm not falling apart here."

"I'll be that rock for as long as you need it Viola. Say the word and I'll be there."

"I need you."