Secret Romance

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"Touch your lips, bite your neck. It's alright to do this, as long as it's in secret."

March 9, 2012
Headmaster Styles' Bedroom

I haven't left my room in seven days. Of course, Haley has came by my room and dropped off food. But I haven't eaten any of it. She's afraid that I'm starving myself, but I can't even bare to open my mouth just in case I'll start yelling or crying.

And I still haven't lost the thought of the pain in my heart when Harry hit me. I have lost my trust for him, and I am forever afraid of him. I don't even know if I'll be able to walk out of my room without thinking about it.

Gina is leaving in two weeks. Does she honestly think I'll be able to live another day while listening to her babble on about stupid shit that doesn't matter?

I sat up when I heard her yelling at Harry. "I don't care that you're twenty three! I don't care who you love! You are to leave that little bitch alone whether you like it or not!"

I began to cry when I heard what he said, and I just wouldn't stop. "You never give a fuck about what I say or think do you Gina?! I won't leave her alone! I'll never leave her alone! Never in my life will I ever stop trying to get to her!"

But then I walked to my door when I heard someone walking up the stairs. I put my hand on the handle and someone stopped in front of the door.

"Get your ass down here right now!" I heard Gina downstairs and tears flooded my cheeks when I realized Harry was standing in front of my bedroom door.

"Anastasia..." He breathed outside of my door and I covered my mouth, trying not to cry out or scream. "I know you're in there. I miss seeing you. Please come out later." He was practically begging me to come outside. "I'll be in my room, if you choose to come out."

"Harry if you don't get down here right this minute­–"

"I'm coming!" He screamed and I heard her pounding her feet up the stairs. I didn't want to hear what was coming next, so I jumped onto my bed and covered my head with a bunch of pillows.

How has he lived with her all this time? How could he possibly learn to live with her without wanting to beat the hell out of her?

I was breathing hard and I realized that I was crying again. S​hould I even go out there? I miss seeing him too but... He wouldn't hit me intentionally, would he? Would he kiss me if I walked down there and into his room? What would he even say?

I took my pillows off of my head and wiped my hair out of my face, parts of it getting stuck to my wet cheeks.

I don't even know if I should go out there. What would even happen if I did?

I sighed and looked to the window. It was almost dark outside, and I wasn't even tired. I needed something to do. And if discussing things with Harry will stop making me feel so worthless than so be it.

I walked to my closet and slipped on some shorts and a tank. Then I brushed my tangled hair and slowly opened the door.

It's been thirty minutes since their fight, and I don't know if Gina is still out.

I walked down stairs and into the kitchen, to find no one. I searched the whole house that I'm capable of going to and found no one. That means that she's either asleep or gone.

I took a deep breath and walked up stairs to the left wing. Once I reached Harry's office door, I took a step to the left to where I was standing in front of his bedroom door.

What does his bedroom even look like? How long would it take me to look at everything inside of it? Will he even let me in?

It only took me a split second to stop thinking about his room and start thinking about when he hit me. W​ould he do it again?

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