20 Reasons to Let Go

[ Reason Five ] - Confessions

Kendal had never seen so much blood in all her life. Even in the dim lighting of a nearby streetlight, the crimson liquid was definite against her victim's pure white shirt.

Her eyes trailing up the body that lay in front of her, she felt her heart jump inside her chest, stop beating completely, and then continue pumping at an irregular pace.

It was the girl.

Bile snagged in Kendal's throat, and she heaved forward to relieve her body of the lunch she had eaten earlier.

How could this be happening?

Kendal pinched herself with her thumb and index finger, desperate for this to be a dream. Over and over again she continued to do so until her upper arm began to bruise.

Frustrated tears began to brew at the edges of her eyes, and she let out a whimper.

"I didn't mean to." Kendal now held her head in her hands, rocking back and forth on the curb, sobbing incessantly. "I didn't, I didn't, I didn't, I didn't!" Each sob left her body with more force than the last one, until she could hear the echo of her cries off fade into the distance.

Furiously Kendal raced through the scene in her head. First she was running, running desperately towards the girl and towards the man. Then suddenly she was beside the girl, comforting her, telling her to go. With a final cry, Kendal realized the reality of the situation.

She stayed.

And somehow, someway, I killed her.

Kendal remembered the sound of the knife driving into flesh, and her body shuddered knowing that that flesh had been the flesh of a little girl.

The very little girl she had been trying to save in the first place.

"This is sick." Kendal thought aloud, another rupture of shock tingling down her spine.

She carefully observed the features of her victim, mourning over every detail from her tiny nose to her large, lifeless eyes garnished by long, thick eyelashes.

Beneath her, Cady stirred. Her vision cleared after several moments, and she glanced up to see an expressionless Kendal standing beside her.

Tears were running down her cheeks, and her nose was wet and slightly red.

Cady wanted to reach out and ask what was wrong, but she couldn't find the words. Instead she sat up and glanced around.

Nothing could prepare her for what happened next. Immediately she noticed the body that lay still on the sidewalk in front of her.

She had been expecting a body.

But in her mind she had always envisioned it being the man's body, or perhaps Kendal's.

Both wrong.

It was the little girl's.

Turning back to Kendal without uttering a word, her jaw quivered with the effort not to cry.

Kendal could see that Cady was expecting an explanation. But how can I tell her if even I don't truly know what happened?

Nonetheless, she was unable to bear the silence any longer, and she felt her mouth sputter the words.

"I killed her."

As she spoke, she watched the warm vapor from her mouth dance into the cold air.

Cady said nothing at first, only swallowing hard and then glancing back at the girl. It felt as though she had lost the ability to speak.

When she did finally say something, her voice sounded choppy and pained, "Wh-what?"

Kendal eyes were dead and without light. Her hair was snarled and tossed. Her arms were quaking with fear and regret.

In that moment, Cady discovered that Kendal was much like a box of broken crayons. Beautiful and promising on the outside, but disappointing and sour on the inside.

But somehow, Cady still found herself foolishly in love.

"God damnit, Cady!" Kendal screamed, her voice breaking mid sentence, "Say something!"

Her eyebrows knitting together in anger, Cady snapped, "What do you want me to say?!"

"Anything!" Kendal pleaded, "Anything at all." Her voice tapered off into a whisper.

Gulping, Cady swung her legs over the curb and faced away from the body. She then clutched her stomach, feeling nauseous.

Kendal hesitated before sitting down beside her.

"We should call the police."

"Yeah."

"Okay."

No movement. Only blank stares cast across the black road in front of them.

Kendal looked back at the girl, who was lying motionless in a pool of her own now gravely blood.

"We didn't even know her name."

Cady turned as well, studying the small girl's face. Her lips were perfectly shaped and a dark color, along with her skin. Her straight brown hair was long and soft looking, and her collarbones were prominent and tanned.

"She looks like a 'Leyla' to me." Cady suggested.

"Leyla." Kendal repeated. The name was gentle on her tongue.

She smiled.

Cady shifted to kneel beside the body and took Kendal's hand, "Dear Leyla, you are so brave. We will never forget you, and we're so, so sorry about everything." Choking a bit, she struggled to continue, "It was all an awful, horrible, sick mistake. We love you, Leyla."

Kendal wiped her eyes and hugged Cady tightly, not ever wanting to let go. "Reason number five. Confessions."

Also in tears, Cady kept Kendal pulled tight and nodded, understanding.

"I'm a murderer."

Cady pulled away and looked deep into Kendal's hazel eyes; she could feel a sad smile on her face.

"My best friend is a murderer. But I love her anyway."

Hey there!

Well then. That was really depressing. And I'm sorry it was a tiny bit shorter than usual, but I hope you found it to be enjoyable. It was definitely a pleasure to write.

Were you expecting the person Kendal killed to be the little girl?

Please let me know what you think through your comments and definitely leave a vote to show me you enjoyed the chapter!

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Much love,

( katherine )