Never Let Me Go

NOTHING

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

He kissed me.

He kissed me. Me. Timothy, that's me. 

Niall Horan, the love of my life, kissed. Me. 

I have repeated that ever since we made love yesterday, it was the most magical thing, he didn't cry, he didn't scream, I kissed his neck, his thighs, I made every mark possible on that pale skin and I'll do it again. 

I knew there was love between us, that was obvious. But now I feel like it was finally resurrected, I feel cleansed, like pain never existed in my life. Niall Horan is the medicine I always needed, and I'm addicted, and I think he is too. Because who else does he have to love? Every other girl wants him for money and looks but doesn't look at the inside, doesn't look at what he's capable of. But I do, because I'm perfect, I deserve him for god sakes. 

But it seems every beautiful thing gets ugly, and my happiness was drastically washed away when I saw Liam Payne and Zayn Malik walking down the street with the rest of their search group. The other two bastards Louis Tomlinson and Harry Styles weren't too far ahead. They were all together, like some cult ready to posses my love again and bring him back to hell. Well sorry, but he's in heaven with me, and you can't break the golden gates we made together. 

I wanted to slit their throats, I wanted to cut them all up into little pieces and burn their bodies in the forest. I wanted to so badly, my fingers were twitching. But I know how to hold my anger, I know how to act professional, so I had a small talk with them. Like a normal person would do. 

But they're gone now, walked right away from me without one look over the shoulder. It's amazing not knowing what's right under your nose. Oh, how stupid they are, my own little mice in my own little maze. 

It seems I'm living the good life, and those four boys are left in my dust. 

My heart has never felt bigger, 

Timothy______,

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Timothy walked out into his bedroom, setting his journal onto his desk in the corner of the room before moving to stand at the end of the bed. He saw the love of his life laid on it, his back facing him. The man had to stop for a second, take in the blond's small frame engulfed in his own shirt that he had his lover wear, which was the only thing the blond was aloud to wear, the only other piece of clothing being a small pair of boxers. Niall had looked to have lost a lot of weight, close to 10 pounds by the looks of it, but that was okay, because the blond didn't need the weight he had before. Because Timothy had to admit, his lover was over-fed by whatever management that had enslaved him, and he had him now, so he would feed him at the right times. 

"Lovely?" He called, slowly getting onto the bed and crawling up towards Niall. He sat down and leaned forward, looking down to see the blonds eyes wide opened, blue eyes staring at the wall in front of him blankly. But the bruises on his face were healing really well, and Timothy was sure there wasn't going to be any more necessary injuries. Because Niall was going to listen now, Niall had finally found the meaning of love. The blond was finally brought out of that web that his bandmates had created for him, it filled with disapproval and fame, and now he finally could see, there was no blindness. 

"I always noticed you were a thinker." Timothy brushed the greasy fringe off from Niall's eyes, caressing his fingertips down the blonds face till he got to the plump lips. He wanted to kiss them again. 

'Control yourself Tim, not right now.' He said to himself, and he couldn't help but chuckle at his own caution. What a horn-dog he was. 

"Today, since it's such an amazing day. I should paint you, naked and laid out on this bed. Because I don't have a real one of you yet, I mean the ones that I made of you are amazing, but they were based on my imagination. And this is the real thing." Timothy sighed in adoration, taking Niall's shoulder and lightly pushing the blond so he was now rolled over onto his back. It was weird, the only sign that his lover was alive was the blond's chest rising up and down, but the rest of him looked dead.