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I've lost track of what time it is. All I know is that it must be early morning. The material of my tent has already worn away - thanks to the rough handling of carrying it with me - and I think I may have torn the seams away in a couple places, so it's pretty easy to see that the sky is a shade of dark blue mixing with light.

Lying here, on the uneven ground that possesses one too many stones for my liking, I will myself to move but it's no use. After everything my body has endured in the months of my supposed death, I almost feel like I might as well have died. Everything aches. Everything hurts. In this moment, I'm broken. I'm alone, and I'm scared. I don't know what to do, but I know that the only person I want with me right now is her.

Just thinking about her makes my heart ache. I never wanted to leave, especially leaving her behind. If I could have had my way, I would have stayed and spent every waking and sleeping moment with her. She just has this aura about her, you get sucked in. She loves harder than anyone I know. She cares. She's passionate. She's all of these amazing things that I miss so much, I can't handle it.

Trying to distract myself from my thoughts, I sit up and run my fingers through my hair. It's still tangled, but not as bad as yesterday after trudging through mud and trees for what felt like hours. I quickly scrunch it up into a bun and use an elastic band from my wrist to secure it in place. It hurts, and I can feel the elastic pulling at single strands of hair, but the pain is nothing compared to what happened to me. Nothing will be as painful.

I slide my blistered feet into my boots before stretching my aching arms and legs. Feeling the muscles pull causes me to groan in discomfort, but I try and ignore it.

My backpack sits in the corner of my tent, and I pull it forward to sit between my legs. I don't have any food in here, just a bottle of water, my cell phone and charger, - which is kind of pointless at this point since there aren't any sockets in the woods - a picture of her and one of her favorite band shirts which I sometimes hold close to me when I really feel down. She's always been there.

Unscrewing the cap from my now lukewarm bottle of water, I take a few small sips to rehydrate. I know that I have to preserve what I have, for now at least. I can't afford to waste any supplies. I grab my cell phone and hit the lock button, causing the screen to light up. I smile at my background; it's a picture of the polaroid we took on my birthday a few years back. Best night of my life. There's still a notification that I have one voicemail message left to hear, which I'd been saving for today. It was something to look forward to.

I've been recently listening to all of the messages she sent me since I left. The mixture of emotions has been draining, but also exciting. She feels the same way. All this time, she's felt the exact same way as I have, and now it's screwed up. This whole thing has probably ruined everything. Had I been braver and actually told her how I felt, maybe we would have got to spend some time together before I would have had to go. My leaving was inevitable, I know that now. I almost know too much. Too much information can kill a person; even if they're still alive, it kills the mind. This is my life now, forever changed.

The sound of rustling outside causes me to break away from my thoughts, and I automatically freeze. I can almost hear my heart beating rapidly in my chest with anxiety. What if they've found me? What if they're coming to take me away again? I won't let them. I can't go back. I won't.

The sound of light patter on the woodland floor automatically eliminates the chance of it being a bear, or a human. I can hear clattering of tins and whine at the realization that whatever is outside has gotten into my stash of food which, by the way, isn't a lot.

I wait for a few more seconds and quickly check my phone battery - which is 72% thanks to the power socket I used at that stingy underground station yesterday - before stuffing it into my pocket and heading for whatever's outside.

The sound caused from unzipping the tent seems to startle the creature as it lets out a small screech before running further into the woods. By the look of it's striped tail, I guess that it's a raccoon.

I quickly check my surroundings, making sure I'm alone, before heading over to the massacre left behind thanks to that damn raccoon.

Empty packets litter the ground, along with leftover pieces of fruit that I managed to steal at an outside fruit shop. All that seems to be left is a tin of beans that it couldn't manage to open. Great, looks like I'll be starving tonight.

I use my feet to kick away the mess and form a path towards the stump of wood I set up last night as a seat. Everything used for the fire last night is thankfully still here, so I quickly add a couple extra twigs, kindling and some logs. Once that's done, I run back to my backpack in the tent and carry it out with me, sitting it down next to my feet. Rummaging through the side pockets, I find the lighter I picked out of one of the trash cans at the underground and carefully manage to start a fire.

Never in a million years did I ever picture myself sitting alone in the woods with nothing but a campfire and a tin of beans to keep me from going hungry. I've had to grow up fast, I guess. I don't even want to know what I must look like right now. I know I have bruises on me, but that's expected given everything that's happened, and I'm pretty sure I have a cut on my forehead since I can feel it stinging if I frown too much.

With the little money I had with me, I managed to buy myself basic camp necessities: a tent, water, food supplies and a pot. At first, I didn't really understand why I would need something like a pot but after a couple seconds it clicked. And now here I am, all by myself, heating up a tin of beans over a campfire.

I don't bother waiting until it's fully cooked because honestly I'm too hungry to wait. So instead, I scoop the semi-warm beans into my hand before shoving it in my mouth. My stomach churns at the feeling of food entering my system but I keep eating until it's all gone. I left half of the beans in the tin for dinner tonight so I'm not worried.

A vibration fills the silence of the woods, causing my heart to stop momentarily. I'm surprised I even have a signal here. There's two bars.

I quickly wipe my hands on my jeans before grabbing my phone from my pocket to see if it's who I think it is.

Yes. It's her. It's actually her.

I quickly hit the green button and bring the phone to my ear.

"H-hello?"

Well look at that, she's alive.

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