The Blue Book

The tenth chapter. Helga.

The friend of the inquisitive giant of six foot broke a heavy and evident sweat where he stood in front of me. He was forced against the fragile walls of my family home's dining room that where on the verge of falling apart. Key word: verge since I had come its rescue and now was busy renovating.
It was quite peculiar watching a man of his length bathing in his own nervousness like the fountain in the backyard. At present the fountain in the back wasn't squirting much of anything, but I planned on making it, soon enough. I had always imagined that her cheeks grew a bit more healthy in colour every time it'd rained, I mean, rain and fountains, where's the difference? Anything to make her stay. But now, the day that was never supposed to be, was happening. She is nowhere to be found. I am sure it is his fault. Which explains his caution in my presence, the wet pool on his chest and his insufferably pathetic pleas for me to me reasonable. I am reasonable.
'Mr... Mr. Golovin, put the pistol down.'
Anything to bring her back.
'I will hurt you.' I said, utterly void of any kind of feeling, except for my desperation for her return, but I didn't let that slip through. I'm an excellent actor, obviously, I didn't want to shoot the poor man, he couldn't help what she'd done to her. I shivered slightly, imagining what she could do to sway a man while actually trying, considering: here he was before the gun I held, insulting me for her and he'd only seen her sleeping once. What was she capable of, should she make an effort? I better go on with the act, shouldn't I? I had never done things like this! If I was to protect her I had to be known as vicious, perhaps even ruthless. He seemed sort of pious so I went on;  'I will inflict pain upon you only God's angels have seen.' I myself rather detest all things churchy.
'Let the hell go of me, monster. God's angels are the good of this world, how you can speak of them as fiends and bringers of hate without turning to ash must be the work of the devil.' His response seemed to ensure that I had hit a god-fearing nerve. I continued.
'The reason only God's angels have seen the pain you will suffer is because they are good. They bring peace to dying men, and must therefore see and withstand the sound they make in their torment. But for you, no angel is coming. You have taken mine away, and as you die, no one will come.' Ew. I didn't like this, not one bit. Who could have thought I had such a dramatic vein in my otherwise very logical body?
'You have no angel. No angel could bear to be your companion.' He seethed.
'Helga did.'I cursed internally.
He stopped exhaling so goddamn loud and went still beneath the pipe of the gun. Why had I said her name? Now he could look for her, and bring her away from me even further.
'Helga.'He mouthed. He didn't even have enough voice to whisper.
'Where is she?' When I spoke her name my voice trembled and broke, but not now. Now my voice was poison. This was no act.
'I want to now that too, and I'll have you know that it'll be before you can stuff your disgusting lies on her.'
'I have never lied to her.' I wouldn't.
'Since you have never spoken to her. Because she is sleeping, sleeping for years and never dying. Because of your sorcery.'
'It's called science.' I smiled. 'You should teach yourself, and maybe you'll understand why it is she and I who will spend years and years and never die.' That wasn't true.
'Everything must die, eventually.'
'Hush, have you forgotten who it is that holds the gun?' I made a minimum pause between every word, just for the effect and it did do the trick.
'I don't know where your puppet is.'
'Puppet?'
'Yes, puppet. Since I assume you won't be asking her to be your eternal undying love.'
'You're right. I won't. That won't be necessary.'
'Of course, because she will just run into an immortal life with a madman, no questions asked. You're not that irresistible, in fact, you're rather ugly.'
'I kept her alive.'
'You'll have her in love with you out of guilt?'
In love? Ha! I wanted a companion, and she was supposed to be mine, but I'd never... No, never. I wanted a person in my life who'd never leave me and she was meant to be that one, the one, my one. Yet, here he was, and he had never been part of my dream, and this conversation with him should never have been allowed to take place.
'What she is to me and what I am to her has nothing to do with you, and bloke, don't forget the gun.'
'We both know you're going to do it. You're mad enough for it. I might as well make the most of my last minutes.'
'Oh, I'm angry all right. But I'm no killer.'
'No, I don't mean angry. You're insane. And I know you are a killer. I saw you.'
The beast's role and my role switched. My shoulders sank and I searched his face, his oddly handsome face in the hope that he was nothing but a liar. Maybe he was, but not in this. He'd seen me do it. I'd hit his friend and he'd fallen to the ground, helpless.
'He was my friend. I grew up with him and as soon as he started asking questions about her, you hunted him down and killed him in cold blood. She might owe you her life, but if you say you love her, will you really claim to want her spending the life you gave to her chained to a murderer? She's a clean slate, nobody is a clean slate, but she is. You mustn't ruin her. If you want be gone that bad, then fine, I'll be gone. Simply promise me, you'll put her first, her wishes and plans, always before your own. Promise. Because that is the definition of love.'
'She belongs with me.'
'Where is she then? The very first thing she did was to run for the hills. She ran, from you. Mr. Golovin, for her sake, let her run fast, and let her flee far.'
'She'll need me.'
'For what?'
'She'll have questions, plenty of them.'
'Such as?'
'Whoever you are, you clearly haven't been threatened all that much. You ask nothing.'
'I ask these questions, since I will shortly die in any case.'
Oh, for the love of Darwin, this boy and his dramatics, it's so boring!
'What's your name?' I asked.
'You don't even know? You don't care to memorise the names of those you hire? Do you remember his name? Do you know who he was? Who's gonna miss him? Do you? Your so called love do not justify all you've committed.'
'Was it that half giant who pried about Helga the other day, just like you? When I ordered you to carry her inside from that steel monster of yours? That was your friend? I should've known the two of you know one another.'
'Knew.'
No, know. If I'm one thing, it's miserable, and if it's one thing I'm not, is a liar, and I already told him I'm not a killer. But he had to figure out this one on his own. His friend wasn't dead, he was missing, but technically since no one was looking for him, well, then the friend wasn't missing either. Wonder what that made him?
'Ah, yes, that is correct. Now, tell me your name, there was thirteen of you people. Six who carried her inside, six who guarded her day and night and one with the gun to silently put down every foe I might have made for her. You are currently my biggest one since you know her name and keep asking questions that are not healthy for you, see, how am I supposed to keep track on thirteen names of morons, bloke?' The truth was I remembered everybody's name, except for this one.
'Will you just get it over with? You'll have no use of knowing my name. Corpses don't need 'em.'
'I'm not going to kill you, bloke. Your name?'
'Lars! It's Lars.'The tall man spat out. 'And you killed my best friend, Copper.'
Ah, very imaginative, really. I wondered who he was running from. Surely it must be made up, for some reason? 'Lars, yes, see the thing about copper is that it's gloriously coloured in red and orange with a hint of gold, much coveted, very beautiful in a rough sort of way, but with time and due to weather and likewise it gets covered with verdigris, green like mold or worse. As of right now, your youth is keeping you safe, but you will, like your friend wither by the smothering hand of age and not even someone like Helga will be able to stand your smell.'
'I don't know her, but I choose to assume she won't care. Besides, green looks good on me. Since you seem to know all there is about verdigris you ought to know metal such as bronze and brass,' he'd stopped shivering and sweating in a matter of minutes almost as if he'd been faking it all along, presently standing tall, nailing my angry eyes with his calm ones, 'they use the patina as cover, as a shield for itself to withstand the smothering grip of age you seem to fear so much, but don't you worry, it has already caught up with you. Sorry, old lunatic, but the years have already put its brand on you. The actual glory of copper is the shine it reflects while still new and when it grows old, the secret of long lost beauty barely visible underneath the green you compare to mold. I think of verdigris as a second chance to capture a few more eyes.'
*****
Hello to you all! I hope you're having a glorious day/evening/night/whenever you're reading this. I've a small but important note to anyone who's interested in continuing this story that with this chapter I will also update the title of this book and the cover of it. I have yet to learn the art of creating covers, but I've done my best and I hope it'll be somewhat intriguing. It'll be named The Blue book, and I've written my name on it and a quote. I hope you'll like it and if you have any improvements whatsoever in mind please let me know. That would be all, and thanks for taking time with this thing. /thefrozenosviva.