Reflection

Voices

Is it me or do I hear voices
A thousand whispers of my choices
I've been through a lot to turn back now
A b****, a brat, the devil, a cow,
Are just some of the names I've been called,
Thank god I'm not dead, praise the Lord,
Thoughts used to enter my head,
Would it be better if I was dead?
Would anyone care if I died?
Will anyone ever hear my cries?
I've learnt not to waste my tears,
Not letting those backstabbers create new fears,
I thought they were my friends,
I thought so wrong,
My only choice was to stay strong.
Even when his words cut me deep,
I was not going to be that one lonely sheep,
They thought their words could get through to me,
They were right, for a while, I wasn't free.
At the time, my smiles were so strained,
Can't stress this enough, my heart was pained.
My feelings were hurt and I just wanted to cry,
At school, I was telling lie after lie,
My friends could see right through me,
Even teachers asked why I was gloomy,
In lessons, I felt small as sand,
They were proud I wasn't raising my hand,
Because I was the one that got everything right,
They were the ones who wanted a fight,
They were the ones who turned everyone against me,
I was so stupid, I just couldn't see
That their backs had been turned from the very start,
My feelings the target, their words a dart,
It hurt so bad, never been through worse,
I should have known our friendship was cursed.