Love or Lust?

Chapter 3

Authors Note:

So I deleted chapter 3 and decided to re-write it because it was so cliche and stupid, I and I re read the last two chapters and they're written weirdly, so Im going to start writing again and it is going to be different and more better, hopefully. I am trying to be as realistic as possible. 

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As soon as I wake up and my head is pounding and I feel sick in my stomach, I get up and run to the bathroom and vomit what I was holding in, I grab some toilet paper and clean the toilet seat that I accidently vomitted on. I wash my face in the water and look at my self in the mirror, I am naked and my make up is smeared even more. I grab a towel and clean all my make up off and use it to cover myself as I walk back to Harrys room, He's laying on his stomach, snoring slightly and all I can see is Harrys back and his mop of hair. Images in my head appear of last night and my stomach flutters, All I remember is pain and pleasure. I pick up last nights dress, slip it on and gather my belongings. I really hope Karen isn't awake, I have a massive headache and I am in no mood to explain things to her. As I walk down the stairs my body feels sore and my feet is killing me, Im never wearing heels again. I shut the door quietly not wanting to wake any one up and take the short walk back home. When I open the door, the house is silent and I assume my mom is at work. I look at the cable box and notice its ten past one, I never wake up around this time but I was out all night, and even though I just woke up now I still feel exhuasted and I just want to climb back in bed, watch all 8 Harry potter films and eat all day but I wont, I need to tell Karen about last night and to be honest I don't want to because that would be extremely awkward. But if I don't speak to her she will bug me until I do so I decide to call her. I take my phone out of my clutch and dial her number. She doesn't answer and I frown. I decide to text her.

'Hey, I wanted to talk to you today about last night' I hit send and put my phone away. I walk up to my room and take a shower and wash my hair. I walk out and make sure my curtains are closed, I don't want another incident to happen again. I untangle my wet hair and put a robe on. I check my phone and notice I got a text from Karen that says

'Sorry I'm not home, I got laid lol. I'll be home in a few then you can come over yeah?'

I laugh at her choice of words and decide to get ready. I put on some black skinny jeans and a navy blue t-shirt and my vans and wait for Karen to call or tell me when I can come over. As I wait I drift off slowly and wake up to the sound of my phone, telling me that I have a text message. I read the text from Karen and it says for me to come over. I look at the time and it's nearly 5. I grab my phone and house keys and make my way over to Karens and Harry's house, I hope Harry isn't there, I feel weird because I lost my virginity to him and I barely know him. We've never spoken before, only exchanged glances when I spent time at their house but that's all, he is never in the house anyways and I never really cared for him in that way but now that I think about it, we're going to be seeing each other more, after all he did agree to teach me a few things and just the thought of it makes me feel weird.

Before I know it, Im in front of Harry's and Karens house and I'm knocking on their door, a few seconds later Harry opens the door and he's shirtless. I feel my mouth go dry and my eyes scan his chest and how his tattoos look perfectly drawn in his skin. Harry hovering over me shirtless flashes through my head, I can't believe I had sex with him last night.

"Oi, Ronnie come in!" Karen says and I quickly snap out of my thoughts. Harry walks away somewhere else and I follow Karen up to her room.

"So what did you want to talk to me about" She asks as soon as I close the door behind me. We both lay on the bed and I tell her everything that happened last nigh, How Harry took me to a club and the guy that worked at the bar knew Harry really well and allowed us to drink under age and I took advantage of that and got drunk and how we came back to his bed room and had sex. I don't think it was to happen that way, I feel like I should have been sober but it's too late now. 

"Wow, way to go Ronnie" she says amusingly. I feel embarrassed.

"I'm not proud about this" I admit.

"What? Isn't this what you wanted?"

"No, well yes but I wanted to be sober."

"Well it's too late now, you can be sober the next time" She says while wiggling her eyebrows. The thought of me and Harry have a 'next time' makes me unsure if there will be one. 

"I don't know when there will be a next time, we haven't discussed anything about this favor"

"Well then you better discuss it"

"yeah" is all I manage to say.

"Soo, what did you do last night?" I ask her.

"When Harry picked you up, I went back home and one of his friends came over, his name was Zack or Zayn I think and he asked for Harry but I told him he was out and he was really hot and I was bored so I asked if he wanted to hang out and we had sex" She lets out and I know I should be shocked or something but I'm not, this is Karen and that's who she is and I love her for it, she is so out going that I can't help but feel jealous at times. 

"Did you tell harry?"

"No I forgot, I'll tell him now" and then she screams Harry's name and waits a few seconds for him to answer and screams his name again and he comes into the room and he's still shirtless.. fuck he's hot. I think in my head.

"WHAT!?" He shouts clearly annoyed. 

"Your friend Zayn came over last night and asked for you" 

"Did you tell him I was out with Ronnie?" he asks and I swear I can see his face go from annoyed to worried. But I ignore it.

"No I just told him you was out" 

"Oh okay, I'll ring him right now" He says and leaves the room momentarily. When he closes the door behind him I find myself thinking about last night, it was a blur but I remember most of it and how he stared into my eyes while he thrusted me, this is unhealthy.

"What are you thinking about?" Karen asks breaking me away from my thoughts.

"Last night" I admit. 

Karen sits up and looks at me with her eyebrows raised,

"I think you want more" I feel my cheeks heat up and I dont know what I want, does he want more? He hasn't even brought it up yet.

"Go talk to him" she adds.

"I guess I can do that" I say before getting up and walking to Harrys room and knocking lightly.

"Come in"

I open the door and find him laying on his back on his phone and he's still shirtless. Fuck. I cough and look away.

"I wanted to talk to you about the favor I asked, I'm still confused on how we're going to do this" I admit. He puts his phone away.

"Yeah me too, but I guess I can ring you whenever I'm free?" He suggests casually.

"Yeah thats a good idea" I say. We exchange numbers and I walk back to Karens room, I find her sleeping and decide not to wake her. I turn the TV on and lay with her untill I fall asleep as well.