I Love You

Chapter Ten

Silence

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The ambulance finally arrives to find me sobbing on the kitchen floor. I clamber into the back of the audience with Kazuki's mother, squeezing her hand with my own. Her pale hand is icy. I squeeze so hard that perhaps my life will flood into her.

She can't be dead. I won't let it happen.

When we arrive at the hospital, I take the time to call my parents. They are hurriedly informed of what has happened. My mother breaks down, wailing down the phone before handing it over to my father. She was very good friends with Kazuki's mother. They make it very clear that they intend to head over to the hospital.

My mother also states that she will call Kazuki's father. He hasn't been around for years. I'm not even sure Kazuki likes him.

After that, I am sat in silence. I have seated myself on a plastic hair that was provided to me. It was once a vibrant red, but now the colour has faded away to practically nothing. My gaze slides up and down the hallway, watching as people walk around. I watch as other families sigh in relief, pushing doors open and chatting amongst one another.

The smell of bleach invades my nostrils. It fills my head, causing immense pressure on my brain. The scent is too overpowering. It sends my mind into a frenzy. One that is not welcome right now. I soon have a headache and I press my fingers to my temple, frowning intensely at the floor.

The floor beneath my feet is surprisingly clean. As are the walls. As is everything else in sight. The white wood is all polished perfectly. The overhead lights illuminate the entirety of the hallway. All I can do is sit and stare at my feet. My fingers have begun to fiddle with the hem of my shirt.

A sure sign that I am panicking. This is my fault.

If I hadn't let Kazuki come home with me, he could have been there. By refusing his request, I could, ultimately, have saved his mother. Therefore that makes her death my fault.

Has Kazuki figured this out? If not, then he will soon. When he does eventually tie the blame to me, he will hate me. We will never speak again. That will destroy me.

My breath catches in my throat and it suddenly becomes hard to breath. It is as if a cold hand is around my neck, crushing all bones in the way. I gasp for air. All I can manage are rapid, shaky breaths. Tears form in my eyes. On top of the difficulty breathing, sobs begin to rise in my throat.

I end up choking. This catches the attention of a nearby nurse. She tells me to take deep breaths, before telling me that she is going to find me a drink of water. By the time she comes back, I am a crying mess for the second time today. There is a sympathetic look upon her face as she hands the plastic cup to me.

"These things are always hard. But keep breathing deeply, keep sipping from that cup. I'll try and come back with some news, okay?" With that, she left. Silence engulfed the hallway. This was very quickly broken by my loud sobs. Footsteps soon followed after that, with more sobs.

"Harmony!" My mother's voice makes me look up. I see her running towards me, her hair streaming out behind her. There are tearstains on her cheeks. Her familiar, welcoming blue eyes are brimming with tears, the sparkle missing from them. Her pale skin is blotchy and red, her makeup is running. I pull her into a tight hug, burying into the familiar scent of her shampoo.

"How is she?" My father soon follows, placing a reassuring hand on my shoulder. His hair is slightly dishevelled. I can tell that he, too, is on the verge of tears. His red and puffy eyes give this away. He has not cried, however. Probably for the sake of my mother and I.