I Love You

Chapter Twelve

Silence

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For the next week, it physically hurts me to see Kazuki in so much pain. While his father settled into his old house, Kazuki decided to come and stay with my parents and I. He slept beside me in my bed, always making a stupid excuse to cuddle with me. My parents didn't mind this, however. They only smiled sadly.

Throughout the night, I could always hear Kazuki crying softly. Sometimes I would outstretch my hand, wiping away the tears. I would try to smile at him through the dark. He would feebly smile back, but it never fully extinguished the pain behind his eyes.

Other times, I would end up crying with him. Kazuki's face would crumple up. He would always stare back at me, mumbling that it hurt. He would constantly tell me that he wanted it to stop. It brought tears to my eyes every time.

"I know it hurts, Kaz." I had mumbled to him, brushing my thumb ever so gently across his lower lip. My curtains had been left open. Moonlight flooded into my bedroom. With the guidance of this pale moonlight, I could see Kazuki's milky skin. His eyes were tired. They were empty. He forced a smile, though there wasn't any meaning behind it anymore.

There were several days when he would hide in my room while I would head to school. He just couldn't bring himself to face another day. If he ever did manage to attend school, he would only break down on the way home, complaining that it wasn't fair. All I could do was watch as he continuously broke down. All I could do was watch him cry until he was empty.

It hurt me to know that there was nothing I could do to help him. It hurt me to know that I was completely helpless. This information would go straight to my head, causing a hurricane of doubt inside my mind.

As I am walking home, I decide that I need a detour. A pale hand runs through my hair as I cross the road, heading under the canopy of leaves that used to provide me with much comfort. Spindly trees tower upwards on either side of me, swaying in the breeze. I continued to walk, watching as it gets darker and darker as the leaves grow thicker.

I come to a stop at a familiar clearing. There is an old blanket abandoned on the grass. The blue and black checked pattern has faded, due to years of heavy rain. Using my hands to part the branches, I enter the clearing. My eyes dance around the area, taking in all the familiar memoirs.

Kazuki and I used to spend as much time here as we could. I can tell this from all of the markings that we have left on the trees. On one tree, we decided to scratch our initials. On another, we would measure our height. There was another tree on which we had tried to draw little stick people, with a stick pet.

I seat myself on the bed of grass, turning my face up to the sky and closing my eyes. Hints of sunlight beam down upon my pale skin. A content smile tugs at the corners of my lips. A group of birds fly overhead, squawking to one another about something. A gentle breeze made the grass tickle my bare skin. It made the trees in my vision dance with one another.

I am pulled from my daydream when my phone begins to vibrate in my pocket. Without checking the caller ID, I press the phone to my ear. I mumble some kind of greeting, though it comes out as a question.

"Harmony." I inwardly breathe a sigh of relief when Kazuki's voice comes through the phone. A part of me will forever hope that he is calling me. It's always nice to hear his voice, even if it isn't quite his voice at the moment. "How are you?"

"I'm good, thanks. I'm tired. School was boring. Lessons were boring. My head is pounding. Although, a bee flew into our maths lesson, which caused a lot of shrieking and screaming. It was pretty funny." I tell him, fully aware that he is probably still sat in my room right now. He did not wish to attend school today. This meant that he would have spent the day tidying my room, watching movies and talking with my parents. "Most of the boys ended up checking out this supply teacher. It got super stressful."