Everything About It

Chapter 5

Just to say, if you want you can listen to the song while reading, totally up to you but I just put it up because I thought it related to this chapter XD

----------------------------------------------

The music was blasting through my ears. It was meant too, I was trying to block out everything but no matter how high the volume was it wouldn't work. The knocks on the locked door got stronger, the voices in my head got louder and the pain in my heart got bigger. I'm not safe anywhere, at home I'll get questioned, at school I'll get talked about and by myself...that's worst of all.

I decide to go to Xavier's. Putting on my headphones, I put my iPod on shuffle and start to make my way to his house. I remember how I used to walk these streets with Shane, I smile at the thought. It was always late at night, "so nobody could witness our weirdness" he'd always say. At first I thought it's because he didn't want to be seen with me and I guess he caught on with that thought because he started taking me to very public places.

But this street, this was the one particular street that had Shane Archerbolt written all over it. Figuratively, of course. This was the street that he had his first kiss, this was the street he first broke his ankle in, this was the street he first told me he loved...me? Everyone knew him as the hyperactive and sarcastic kid but I knew him as the real him...I knew him as the secretive and hard to get guy. No one knew how close Shane and I were so if I had an outburst like his step sister, Kristina everyone would wonder why.

I soon find myself in front of his house door, but I'm hesitant. I somehow can't find myself to knock. C'mon, Adria. Just get your fist and knock. But I don't have to because as soon as I'm about too Xavier's father opens the door and looks shocked at the least to see me standing in his front porch. He gives me a confused look as I stare at him acknowledging the fact that Xavier looks a lot like him.

"Oh, err. Sorry sir. I was just about to see Xavier..." I say while giving him a smile.

"Ah, he never told me your coming over" he asks with another questioning look, which freaks me out because oh my God...Xavier looks exactly like his father, same hair type, same eyes and same confused face expression.

Grinning and scratching the back of my neck, I reply "Hahah, yeh it wasn't exactly planned...out"

"Yes. I could've guessed. Well, I was about to head out but Xavier's in the shower so just go ahead and wait in the kitchen. Order in if you're hungry and tell Xavier not to wait up. I'll be quite late, tonight"

I smile and nod then move out the way so he can make his way; I walk in, slyly take off my shoes and close the door lightly.

Xavier's POV:

I stand under the hot dipping water of the shower still in my school clothes. My head kneeled against the warm wall. It's as if I was suffocating, it felt like the room temperature just suddenly rose to the highest point. I shake my head roughly, letting the water drip everywhere I could hear my father's knocks on the door. I close my eyes as a tear rolls down my eyes. I haven't felt this kind of pain since last year and I honestly didn't want to feel it again, not now and not ever. The knocks on the door get louder by the second until I'm forced to answer.

"I'll be out in a sec, dad!" my voice breathes but I don't get a reply, just more knocks. I and my father's relationship isn't the loving type. It's more of a 'we live in the same house so we just got to deal with it' relationship and to be honest. I preferred it like that. I look down at my hands, why do I have to have such a crappy life?! All the worst scenarios, never the good! It's not fair, please just stop. It's not fair, please just stop. I'm scared. I could feel myself shivering, looking all around the small shower space. It's so small and I suddenly feel so trapped, it felt as if it was getting smaller? Please stop, I'm scared. Please stop, I'm scared.

My body drops on the ground that somehow feels so cold, my clothes wet from all the water from the shower tap above my head. I just bang my head again and again on the wall. Stop, please just stop. I'm scared. Stop, please just STOP!   The space is getting tighter, I can't breathe, I can't breathe. Let me out, LET ME OUT!! I can't- I can't breathe!  I try screaming but nothing comes out my mouth so I just break down.

The tears on my face are getting stronger by the second and suddenly the lights are out and by a second they're back on. No, no. The worst scenarios, always in the worst scenarios. I lose control of myself and just sink in the running hot water. Drip, drip, drip everywhere.

Adria's POV:

I knock on the bathroom door scared for Xavier, the lights went out and I know how much that would've scared him.

"Xavier, are you okay? Can I come in?"

You could tell from my voice that I was worried sick. All I could hear is the running water and that just brings all the horrible thoughts into my mind. It's so hard to keep optimistic these days, with all the strength in me, I reach for the shining handle and slowly but carefully start to open the door and that's when I see it. My best friend, hands on his head, breathing heavily, getting drenched by water. I bite my bottom lip as tears start to form in my eyes. I just shake my head and let out a sigh,

"Xavier..." I whisper but make sure it's loud enough so he could hear me.

He doesn't reply, doesn't even move physically. He just runs his hands through his damp black hair. I've seen Xavier scared before, but not too this state. Never.

Xavier's POV:

I can't, I just can't hold it in. She can't see me like this, no one can. I could hear her light footsteps get into the bathtub; she puts her arms around my shoulders and says two words that I hear every day but somehow it never makes a difference.

"It's okay..."

This time, she was holding me protectively. She cradles my head and I just break down as I sob and weep into her shirt. I'm weak, lonely, broken. I can't handle it, I can't handle anything. The impact is too strong, the memories are too unforgettable.

Adria's POV:

I hug him tight, hoping it'd make him feel a little safer and maybe, just maybe, a little stronger. It's normally me crying into Xavier's arms, breaking down and gong into a uncontrollable state. I can't bear to see him in such a state, espically to this extent. I whisper and tell him how it's all going to be okay, how nothing can hurt him. Just like a mother to her son...

But it's no use, because it just gets worse as the lights start to flicker and then it's just complete darkness, he screams in agony but his scream turns into a cry of pain. I could tell that flashbacks were haunting his mind and the darkness just made it seem more real.

"It's okay, its okay...everything will be okay" I try soothing him with my voice,

But I'm also trying to convince myself...

-----------------------------------

Okay, okay. I know, bad me! I said I'd update on Thursday and it's Monday....Not that long, though! Haha *smiles cheeckily*

Buttt, HAPPY LATE VALENTINE'S DAY XDXD May the love be spread around ;) Alright, so I'm hoping the next update to be soon but it is the holidays sooo....wait a little longer!! I know, too many depressing chapters but need you not worry, you'll be crying of laughter very soon :D Anyway, remeber to VOTE, COMMENT AND SHARE! Adios, till next time my fellow wattpaders xD

"But, I must confess that I feel like a monster!"- Monsters, Skillet

-S