D.E.A.R (Drop Everything and Rant)

Dear Guys 1: Beauty is Only Skin Deep

Dear Guys #1: Beauty is Only Skin Deep

S'up, everyone! I'm back. I hope to those who have been following D.E.A.R, have checked out The Apprentice Academy. I could really use your support, guys.

And speaking of guys...while not all guys are like these kind of things I will rant about below, I still feel the need to address these issues, especially when it comes to standards, why guys (yeah, I mean boys or men in this context) put this annoying standard, and how I don't understand their way of thinking and even worse, how I don't get girls who submit to these standards.

Annoying.

#1: 'Goody-two-shoes' Girl is the Ideal Wife

Now, don't get me wrong. I have nothing against the so-called good girl. Heck, if we're comparing me to Western standards, I might be a goody-goody girl. But is it me, or my local books seem to have lame concept of relationship and portrayal of males and females, or possibly the people in my society are just that.

The conventional romance novel in my country is really not my cup of tea. And it's not the excessive romantic gestures or sweet moments that repulse me (I can still endure), it's the lack of story depth and demeaning female characterization that repels me from venturing into this genre.

For instance, why do so-called bad boys of the story want innocent damsel as their ideal partners, when they discuss of marriage or serious relationships? Yes, I understand these so-called bad boys are repenting or turning over a new leaf but that doesn't mean it's okay for them to degrade women who are like them as well. And when their innocent women are not perfect or they found out of their sinful pasts, these men go berserk about it, claiming she's disgraceful and such and I'm like, Boy, you aren't perfect either.

And I don't know if it's about life imitates art or the other way around. But this kind of actions does happen in real life. Now, if they were conversing among guys, I guess it's still acceptable. Heck, girls have their gossips and while I don't go around talking about random guys and comparing looks and such, topics about opposite gender does arise at times. And it's the same I observe among men. But to speak so loud in class and then barking at us, girls, to 'preach' to be a better person, a better woman, who wears decent clothes and have decent manners and the likes, I am appalled.

I remember one time at my boarding school, a guy who I hope has passed that immature and idiotic phase, attempted to annoy a couple of girls. Now, joking around is fine or trading spiteful remarks is normal I guess in your angst moment. But there are some things, some words you should have never said.

Like I don't know what the guy's problem is with that particular girl or what the girl has done to him, and I believe he started it during that dinner at the dining hall.

Maybe that girl by the narrow-minded school and society's judgment is considered having lack devotion towards the religion since she doesn't conform to the modest dress code when outside school. But that's her life and her choice and ever heard of Only God can judge us? And currently she's doing really well with her liberating decision to cover up. But before this change, she is actually scorned. I don't know if this is the only reason and maybe there are other things.

But I've seen and knew that guy crossed the line, when the girl uttered her prayer before she ate, the guy cut her off saying, quite loudly, making others, including me to hear, "Hey, did you think doing that could get you to heaven?"

Yes. That happened, ladies and gentlemen. And it may be long ago but I remember. I didn't really know which guy said it because there were a bunch sitting near those girls. So, at the time, I kind of glared at the table but only to be caught by the innocent guy who said it wasn't him. I know. Lame, RB, lame.

Of course the friend of the girl defended her but she was already shot through the heart. She didn't continue eating after that.

And though, the issue kind of resolved. With a mere apology letter from the real culprit of those nasty mouth. Coward, I thought back then.

This just to show how I don't understand the mentality guys have.

Maybe it's wishful thinking, like how a girl wants a prince charming. It turns out guys also want a princess, the Barbie kind I'd say.

And don't get me started on appearance.

Too late.

#2: The Ideal Wife is Still Pretty despite the Hardship She Endures

The definition of pretty in this context is more of on-the-surface-kind-of-beauty. While there are pretty girls who have a hard life, realistically speaking and seeing, that is not always the case. I am aware of human nature and how it's easy to be attracted to the way one's look, but it shouldn't be the main point when it comes to building sincere relationship.

Often, those novels I happen to read and regret of reading it, portrays men to be attracted to pristine women. Like how she has soft and smooth skin, did I also mention having no blemish? Um, okay maybe she takes good care of her body but still. Where is the logic and realism for a girl who has seen and endure obstacles in life to be that pretty like a model? Where? Beautiful, yes. But pretty?

Why can't they mention about how calloused her hand is and how it makes the guy feels something pulling at his heartstrings? Or the scars/imperfections he finds it beautiful or endearing.

Nada. Everything is sugar-coated. Okay, but I guess other media is the same as well, not just at my local media scene.

#3: All in All, They Want a Barbie Wife minus the 'Manly/Career' Achievement

Need I elaborate? And I am also not fond of the way these authors write when it comes to love rival or evil third party. It's like they are purely evil and the stereotype they portray when it comes to describing evil women, like she must wear more scantily compared to the good girl. See, how it only delves on the surface. And the best part to be a female heroine in this kind of lame love story is to downplay your intellectual or achievement. I am really annoyed when all that the girl character could offer is her good deeds and miraculously pretty appearance. Though, good personality or attitude is significant, without the brain or the brawn, you're pretty much useless and pathetic. In fact, it can be quite burdensome. I know I'm possibly hurting hardcore romance lovers but why can't romance be more diverse and appealing for people like me as well?

Once again, I'm addressing to the guys and local conventional publishing industry. Maybe, English novels also have this kind of stereotype and I just happen not to stumble upon this kind of things.

But hey, we're bombarded with stereotypes and generalization.

And while girls can also be judgmental too. We're all humans. And tonight, I'm just letting out these thoughts that I always feel puzzled off about guys and the type of novels I read when I was in my teens. Yes, sadly I'm not a teen anymore (Get over it, RB!).

Anyway, that's all from me, tonight. Glad, I make it short or did I disappoint you guys for my abrupt stop?

Once again, thank you for reading. Please share, vote, comment and/or follow! I really really appreciate and adore you all.

Till then, see ya ;)