Ecstasy

Gilinsky

Jack stares at me, fear in his eyes as he scoots away. "No, I'm sorry. Should I? I... I..."
I shake my head, dread filling my body. "No. You shouldn't. Other than me being your boyfriend."
Jack's face drains of all colour. "You are?" He asks.
I nod, biting my lip. "I don't know if we are anymore."
"Why?" Jack looks confused. I sigh.
"Uh... no reason." A pang of guilt strikes me. Jack nods slowly.
"So... did they tell you when you're being released?"
Jack yawns and shakes his head.
"Okay. I'll leave you to rest then." He doesn't object to me leaving, and I feel angry that he doesn't remember me. It's my fault anyways.
I walk down the hall then I call Sam. He doesn't answer. I call him again, and I hear his phone ringing. I follow the sound until I find him down a poorly lit hall. Odd noises are coming from there; I flip on the light to find Sam's lips interlocked with Skate's.
"What the fuck?!" I yell, completely surprised. I mean, what?!
"Jack!" Sam clears his throat and jumps away from Skate. "I... it's nothing."
I raise an eyebrow. "Nothing? Sure. Uh... I'll make sure to forget this 'nothing.'"
Sam smiles. "Thanks." He and Skate slink out of the hallway, leaving me alone. I stand with my back against the wall and slide down it, my legs giving out. Jack wouldn't remember me and it was better if he didn't. He deserved better than me.
I just really loved him. When he was released, I'm going to take him to all our favourite places. The beach, the zoo, the ice cream parlour where we used to go on dates. Maybe something would jog his memory.
But if he did remember, then he would remember what I did. And then he would hate me more.
I sigh then leave the hospital, calling a taxi to take me back to my house. 
I pay the cabbie and hop out of the car, sauntering up to the front door.
I walk into the kitchen and make myself a colossal sundae. I then put Alice in Wonderland on and start eating my life away.
Ugh, why won't Jack remember me?!