My Own Private Suicide

Chapter 4

Chapter 4
Billie's POV
We start walking back to the hotel. I watch Sara shiver a bit and take off my leather jacket, draping it over her shoulders. "Thanks." "Mhmm." I don't know what to say after that but I decide to ask her why she wanted to go into the forest tomorrow. "Why? Do you know how much shit has happened to me?..." She starts tearing up a bit. "I've been forced to do things, raped, touched by people I didn't want to be touched by. I've lost a lot of friends and I honestly don't see any reason to stay alive." She starts crying and I put my arms around her. "You never told me any of that...I'm so sorry." I hold her and she clutches onto me. After about a minute she lets go and wipes her tears.
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Sara's POV
I look up at him and he's just watching me with tears in his eyes. I don't know what to say so I start walking again. He walks next to me, looking at me like I was an injured puppy. "Thanks for coming with me." "Of course." He says. We get back to the room and I get under the covers in only my bra and underwear. Billie climbs in bed next to me fully dressed, ignoring me. I get annoyed and start unhooking my bra. "Ugh this bra is so uncomfortable." He watches me take it off and tries to act like it's not turning him on. I sigh and look at him "You can still touch me Billie, I'm not a fragile broken girl just because I was raped, I still need passion." He doesn't say anything, just starts kissing my neck and grabbing my breast.
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Billie's POV
I keep kissing her neck as she starts pulling my shirt off. I quickly shake it off along with my sweatpants. I lean over her and kiss her as I slowly slip off her underwear and tease her with my cock. The rest of the sex is a blur. I know I finished inside of her though and that worried me afterwards as we laid side by side panting. She was on the pill but I already got her pregnant once I didn't need to do it again.
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Sara's POV
I lay my head on his chest. "You don't care that I came inside of you do you?" I laugh. "No, what does it matter? I'll be dead soon, even if you did manage to knock me up it wouldn't matter now." I knew it bothered him and it would keep bothering him all night but there was nothing I could do to make him not worry. Eventually we both fell asleep. In the morning I wake up to Billie getting dressed. He catches me watching and runs his hand up and down my leg. "Time to get up, start heading for the forest with Gerard." I roll out of bed and get dressed. Black leggings and a shirt that says "Fuck You You Fucking Fuck".
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Billie's POV
When I see what she's wearing I laugh. "That's what you want to die in?" She nods, swinging her backpack over her shoulder. "Let's get downstairs and check out so we can get breakfast with Gee." "Gee? What are you two best fucking friends now?" She shrugs and walks past me, opening the door and walking out. I catch up with her half way down the hall. "What's wrong?" "What's wrong?...really Billie? Look at the situation, think of what could possibly be wrong." He sighs. "Are you scared now that we're here doing it?" "I don't want to talk about it, let's just go."
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Gerard's POV
Sara and Billie meet me at the diner near the forest. They're really quiet. We eat some breakfast and I talk more about what I do, I can tell neither of them are really listening so I just shut my mouth and pay the bill. Sara slips on her backpack and walks out of the restaurant leaving Billie and I behind. "Is she okay? Maybe we shouldn't go if she's upset." Billie looks me in the eyes, I can see he's almost on the verge of tears. "No, she wants to go...I think she's just having a hard time with...something." "Okay."
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Sara's POV
I wait outside for Billie and Gerard. I don't know why I was feeling so...shitty. I've wanted this for so long, this was my destiny. I'm not going to chicken out, am a little scared? I guess...I mean after I go in there I know there won't be any coming out. They both come out of the diner, Gerard starts leading the way as Billie and I follow. Billie puts his arm around my waist as we walk, occasionally touching my butt. We make it to the beginning of the path into the forest. I take a deep breath and Billie whispers in my ear "it's all going to be okay, I'm here." I nod and kiss him.
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Gerard's POV
We start walking down the path and I turn around to tell them the ground rules. "Okay so from this point on don't leave the path and if you see anything that scares you we can turn around and leave. I do have to leave the path every once and a while if I find someones tent so I can talk them out of suicide but you guys can stay on the path and wait If you want." "Okay, cool." We walk farther down the path, just as we're about to pass the "No Entry" sign Sara clears her throat to get my attention.
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Sara's POV
"Listen Gerard, the reason I wanted to go on this tour was to actually get into the forest...to commit suicide." His mouth hangs open, I knew if anything were to come out next it would be some bullshit counciling technique that would "get me to re-think things." He's about to speak when I stop him. "You're not going to talk me out of it, I have to do this and I want to do this so save your bullshit. Thank you for getting us to this point, Goodbye."
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Billie's POV
She starts walking away. I begin to follow shaking Gerard's hand then moving on. Sara steps across the chain with the hanging "No Entry" sign and I follow. Before I get my foot across Gerard stops me. "Wait, Billie. Don't do this." "Look man, Thanks for your help and concern but I've got it from here." I step over the chain and take Sara's hand walking straight into the jaws of death.