That Heart Is So Cold

Part 16

"ah...mn.." levi was pushed up against the wall inside the elevator as Eren kissed him roughly. His fingers ramming over the buttons.
He was supposed to click four but both three and seven got clicked to, he begged for no one to go inside as Levis hand reach to his hair.
Except the stop at floor three, some seconds later the doors to floor four opened, some seconds to much for them both.
Time to think.
And then they walked out of the elevator and to the door 4c and they both thought "what now?"

I fumbled in my pocket, desperately trying to hook my fingers in the keys that for seven weeks hadn't been a problem to find but today the front pocket seemed to be without end.
Felt relieved to see that Levis pockets weren't going on forever, unlocking the door.
Felt relieved to have hes lips back on me.
Felt relieved by silence.
The apartment was quiet and so where the streets, it was dark and not anything that could disturb was near.
His hands on my spine, traveling down, hes eyes sharp and with a goal.
His eyes on me.
His goal was me
?
Shoes where quickly kicked of, was close to get stuck with the shoelaces once, nearly falling over in the living room.
Falled over any way, into the couch.

His hands that skilfully unbuttoned my shirt. Caught my self wondering just how many times hes hands had unbuttoned others shirts.
Even got to think how many other person's his fingers had eagerly traveled on their bodies.
Decided to think I didn't care.
Cared a bit anyway.
A groan I wasn't sure where it came from, truly didn't care, hope slightly it wasn't me.

Shirt of.
Shirt of.
I thought that it wasn't anything that could possible distiurb us.
No noise, no action, no other persons.
But I didn't think us.
I didn't think it would be us.
Didn't think of him that way.
Didn't know if it was because I tried to push it away, or because he had pushed instead.
Cause then it was words.
"I don't want to"
And I swear if someone had electrified me my body would have reacted less.
Cause for a minute we weren't he.
We where a us, a I, a they.
And now I was nothing.