A/N A little Fimanda one shot based on the prompt by @madxgoon I hope you like it!
He still hadn't opened her snap...Amanda put her phone down on her bed. She had sent Finn a snap chat hours ago and he hadn't even opened it. Ever since she had moved to California she felt them drifting apart. Finn made her feel secure, he made her feel safe, but without him, all her insecurities were coming back to haunt her. Did he even care? Or did she just imagine it? Amanda rubbed her arms, looking out the window, why did people always leave, Finn was the one person besides Jess she had fully let into her heart, and now loving him was hurting her. Her phone ringing pulled her out of her thoughts. It was Finn. She picked it up.
"Hi." She said flatly.
"Hi, is something wrong?" Finn asked worried.
"No, nothings wrong!" Amanda responded, it's okay now that we are talking... she thought.
"Oh, okay good."
They talked for a couple of minutes, Finn seemed distracted.
"Hey, I have to go, I'll talk to you soon!" He said. Amanda though she heard a girl laughing in the background. She frowned
"Okay. Bye." She hung up the phone quickly.
She tried to shake it off, but the whole conversation bothered her. Finn's distracted manner, and then the girls laugh. It was definitely not the laugh of a child. Was Finn with someone else? Amanda paced the room. All these thoughts were whirling around in her mind. She sighed, she needed to get out of her head.
She made her way to the Tower library. She tried to browse the shelves but the couple sitting together in a arm chair giggling was distracting her. It was just bringing to mind all the times she had spent with Finn. She left quickly without getting anything.
It was starting to get dark when she got back to her room. Jess was out with Tim and probably wouldn't be back for hours. She crawled into bed and let her thoughts run wild. No one cared. She was just there, no one really cared about her or what she wanted, and now she was alone. She curled into a fetal position and cried.
• • •
The next week was struggle. Nothing could take her mind off of Finn, but he was so hard to get a hold of lately. Amanda glanced over at her calendar, the week after next was marked in red marker, she remembered. Finn was supposed to come and visit! Her heart lifted a bit. They had made those plans a few weeks ago, she hurried to her phone and texted.Hey, I'm excited about our visit! Can you call me so we can iron out last minute details?
She sent the text. Hours passed and Finn never responded.
●●●
Amanda slowly trudged up the stairs. Finn was supposed to be here, but he never responded. She hadn't heard a word from him in two weeks, yet she still saw updates on social media. He was obviously okay and alive, but for some reason he didn't want to talk to her, and that broke her heart. It was so hard for her to open her heart to him like she did and yet here he was stomping on it. She went into her room, trying to hold her head up, trying to be strong, but thoughts kept tumbling around in her head.
Finn doesn't care anymore.
Finn found another girl.
You heard that laugh, he's obviously spending time with someone else.
Finn never actually liked you, you're a freak, he's was always just too nice to say anything.
She broke down crying. The thoughts wouldn't stop. She stumbled into the bathroom and looked in the mirror. She was worthless, why was she stupid enough to think Finn would care about her? She began to sob harder.
Worthless. Worthless. Worthless.
The words kept pounding in her head. She collapsed onto the cool tile floor and tried to stifle her sobs. She thought she heard footsteps,
"...Amanda?" She heard a voice ask hesitantly. She looked up to see Finn. He looked horrfied.
"What happened..." He asked in alarm.
She looked through her tears.
"What happened??" She asked incredulously. "You haven't talked to me in two weeks, you were supposed to come and visit three days ago. You never said why you didn't come, you never called, nothing. And I've been trying to figure out why! Is there someone else?" She choked out.
Finn looked stricken.
"Someone else?? No! Amanda, listen" He sat down on against the wall next to her. "A week and a half ago we had an OT scare, Philby suspected that they might be tracking communications and I didn't want to put you in any danger so I couldn't call or text or anything. Especially not to you. We were finally able to clear it up, but then my flight got delayed and I wasn't able to get here on time, of course, once I got to the airport, my phone died! Can you believe that? I rushed here as fast I could..." He trailed off.
"Finn, if you were seeing some else I would understand." She said.
"Amanda...did what hear what I just said?" He asked confused.
He moved over closer, pulling her to his side.
"I've only ever truly cared about you, your are so special to me. I never wanted to hurt you, I can be so stupid sometimes, I know I've hurt you in the past, but I'm here to stay, I'm not leaving, I'm not losing interest. No matter what happens you can trust me." He said earnestly.
"Trust doesn't come easily to me Finn, you know that." She said softly putting her head on his shoulder. She wanted to disbelieve what he said, she wanted to put up walls, but here with him, she felt safe. She felt loved.
"I know it doesn't, but Amanda," He said shifting to look at her. "You can trust me, you can trust that if you feel like giving up, I'll be here for you. You can trust that I care. You can trust me even if I'm not right by your side, because I'm not going anywhere."
She buried her face in his shoulder and felt him kiss the top of her head.
Why did she ever doubt Finn's love?
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Kingdom Keepers: The Little Things
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