100 sleepless nights

➳10

100 SLEEPLESS NIGHTS.

for the times i cannot sleep.

lowercase intended.

all rights reserved 2016

© ethan.grey [hollowinsides]

__________________________________________

 i always did forgive you,

no matter the bad

you'd done

told you you'd always

be my number one

love

despite making me bleed

blood.

i always tried to be 

your rock,

someone to lean on, lean on,

give you love, give you love,

never give up &

try to be a better son.

but you tore me up inside

messed with my emotions,

my morals, my life

and you hurt me everynight, everynight

when you were off your meds, 

when you weren't

feeling so sure of yourself, 

when your mind was 

b l a c k

swallowing you up,

 when you couldn't think 

straight,

when you hurt me everynight, everynight

to try and take the pain away ...

and he knew, he knew

but he didn't want to

loose you.

none of us did.

so i would sit on the top step, snuggled

close to her 

and i would tell her a story 

of how i would be next

that the beatings would never

 s t o p,

that me and him,

we'd always be blue

from the wounds our mother gifted

whenever she wasn't feeling so sure 

of herself

or when her mind was swallowed up 

in that big black

hole.

family is shit.

at least mine was anyway. 

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+thank you for reading!

+i hope you enjoyed this chapter :3

+any & all feedback is appreciated.

+happy reading!