Feigning Fearless

•1•

I lay on my bed, lazily focusing on the screen of my laptop sitting in my lap.

'Top ten movies to bring you to tears this year!' Yeah, right. If only I could get someone to pay me to not cry at movies. I'd be rich.

Let me explain myself, my name is Marley. (Weird name for a girl, I know.) I'm not really able to feel driven to tears, to fear, to anger.

Now, you may be thinking, "wow! That's amazing! How lucky not to feel negative emotions like that!"

And I get it, it may seem nice. But it comes with its down sides.

1. Never, ever try to throw me a surprise party. I literally won't care, nor will I be surprised.

2. Now, this is the sad one, (or so I hear) but I can't really feel happy. Or any lovey dovey feelings.

Long story short, I can't really bring myself to care at all.

Sometimes I wish I could. But why bother worrying about something that will only cause me pain in the end anyways? Cause I know it will.

But I'm not going to lie, every now and then, I long for emotion. Like, I really long for it. But of course this feeling doesn't last long anyways.

I let out a long breath, and close my laptop, sliding off my bed, and plugging in my computer on my desk, which is conveniently to the immediate left of my bed. While doing so, I glance up at my Goldfish, Cheese, and realize I haven't fed him today, because yesterday he ran out of food.

"Hey Cheese, what are the..." My voice drops to a whisper. "Current events."

Now, I know he's a Goldfish, therefore always has a blank expression, but I could swear he gave me a look. And with a pun that bad, I can't blame him.

"Yeah, well all you do is float around all day, making bubbles. Someone has to keep things interesting, and you're definitely not." I scoff, and exit the room.

You see, because I don't feel emotions, I've gotta fill in the gaps with humor, or else my life would be extremely boring. So you may think talking to my goldfish is a bit odd, but trust me. It's necessary.

As I make my way downstairs, I make the decision to go and get him some food, since he's hungry and I have nothing better to do. Anyways, there is a place that sells goldfish flakes only a few blocks away, and it's a 24 hour store.

I grab my jacket, draped on the back of the couch, and my shoes crammed against the wall by the front door, like someone opened it and smooshed whatever was in the way. I slip on my black hoodie, and red converse, realizing I may look a bit odd pairing them with white jeans, but I don't mind, so I head out the door, turning off the lights on the way out. I lock it behind me, and walk towards my shiny, blue, state of the art...

Bicycle.

Now, I have my license, having just turned 18, but I do not, however, have the money for a car. I live with my dad, but he's a dead beat that can't hold a proper job, so I have to pick up the slack and work part time at the local minimart just to pay rent on time. So I guess my life's pretty crappy, but that's one of the perks of being an emotionless robot. It really doesn't bother me.

I hop on my bike, and put in my headphones, playing 'Panic! At the Disco' on high volume. I begin pedaling, lazily observing the dark sky, as its 1 AM.

Oh, sorry, did I forget to mention that? Well, it's 1 o'clock in the morning. Surprise. I'm a bit of a night owl.

I stare up at the stars, thinking. What if I was born in a different family? Would I be able to care about things? Was it my life that made me like this, or just a freaky genetic accident?

I sigh, and take a left turn, realizing I'm almost to my destination.

But as I turn, I see a car speeding towards me, or rather, I see bright lights burning into my eye sockets, which paired up with a revving engine, I figure to be a car.

They aren't stopping. I realize, and start to wonder if this is where I'm going to die. I can't see, so I can't move away. But, I'm not afraid. There's no adrenaline pumping through my veins, urging me away from the incoming vehicle. Without fear, my survival instincts are purely intellectual, and not impulsive. Which, during times like these, can be a bad thing.

But suddenly, the car screeches, and swerves, like they just got a clue as to what was happening.

They swerved to a halt, mere inches from me.

As my eyes adjusted to the light, I saw a panicky looking person rolling down the passenger window.

"Are you alright!?" The man asked frantically. He appeared to be in his mid 20's.

"Are you a moron?" I deadpanned. He seemed taken aback.

"I didn't hit you, did I?" He croaked out, my reaction obviously causing him worry.

"I'm fine. But you better get out of here before I call the cops and sue you for something, I could use the money." I said bluntly. I wasn't lying either. I'm sure I could find something to sue him with, given he almost turned me to pulp a few moments ago.

He gaped at me, rolled up his window, and sped off, in his little red car. I began to pedal once again, and finally made my way to the 24 hour store, that conveniently sells fish food.

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YO YO YO WASSUP

IM SO HAPPY TO BE POSTING AGAIN

:D thanks for reading my new story, and to be clear, I have not abandoned my other book, "Shattered", I simply had another story idea, and wanted to write it for you c:

I am planning on writing both of my stories, so stay tuned for both. If you haven't checked the other out, I recommend you do so c: it's a sci-fi about a girl who gets awesomely original super powers. I have several chapters posted, so please go check it out and let me know what you think of BOTH of these :3

Vote, comment, follow, and please tell me if I make any mistakes in my stories so I can't fix them c:

Thank thank thank

Xoxoxo
-Eva

Word count: 1,113