Forbidden Love: We Crave What We Can't Have

The Truth

"When did she get so damn wise," i thought. But she was right. I needed to straighten up my act, face my fears, and do what I had to do. So that's exactly what I did.

First thing was to get Lonnie to even talk to me. He paid no attention to me at school, so I had to do something.I tried texting and calling, but every time there was no response. So, as we always do when we wanted to talk to each other, I went out to the well at the time that he goes out usually, knowing he would try to avoid me. But surprisingly he wasn't there. So the next night I went at the time when we both went out together. Once again no show.

Soon after a week I gave up looking so i just went at the time I used to before I met Lonnie. And when I got there guess who was sitting in that same place in the same position that I met him.

"Lonnie?"

"Who's asking," he responded without even looking back.

"It's V," I said.

"So, it's V now. Huh, funny how you just change your mind," he turned and said. Then he turned back around to the well as if I never was there.

"Look, can we just talk I've been trying to contact you all week,"I said walking over to him and sitting down next him.

" Maybe I don't want to talk. Maybe I just want to be left alone like you left me."

"Well just listen. I've gotten a reality check and I'm sorry about how I've been acting. It's just that what happened hurt. And I know that's no excuse but you guys really hurt me. I mean you guys  went behind my back and made a life decision about me without my consent.  For some reason I couldn't get over that. That's why I was acting the way that i was and I'm sorry for that. Two, when I told you that I didn't love you at the hospital I was really upset at the time and I wanted you to leave so I lied to you. The truth is, I love you with every breath that I breathe. You are my life and soul. I mean that. And three, which is the hardest for me mention, I'm.....I'm actually almost three months pregnant. Right now it's two but as soon-"

"Wait your what,"he said cutting off. 'Why is everyone cutting me off?' I thought.

"I'm pregnant?"

"No, before that."

"I'm almost three months along?"

"No the very first thing you said."

"I'm sorry?"

"Those are the words. Little miss spoiled princess is sorry,"he said smiling looking up at the stars.

"Wait a minute this isn't a joke. I'm serious and did you not hear me when I said that i'm pregnant. I mean the baby is yours,"I said looking over at him confused as hell.

"Oh I know, I heard every word that came out your mouth. And I'm the one who had sex with you three to four months ago and we didn't use protection, so I didn't think you would get pregnant but I had the feeling. And I knew you were lying at the hospital cuz I know you. You shook and hesitated, you hesitate and shake your hand when you lie, plus you never returned the key to my heart when I left it on the table by your hospital bed.You also never asked for the key to yours when we broke up. So, I still have your heart. I'm just surprised that your actually sorry,"he explained still starring up.

He was such a smart ass and was so fucking arrogant, but I couldn't hate him at all. "So, if you knew, why ignore me,"I asked still looking at him.

"I wanted you to see how much you hurt me, the pain you left me with. I almost went crazy without you around. I came out here at the time you did because I was trying to fill the hole you left in me. Your presence was with me. And you're not one to apologize. You think you're always right because how spoiled you are. That's why I was shocked that you did. And of course I'm a little surprised that you're pregnant, but I can't do anything about it. And if anyone is going to have my baby then I'm glad it's you. I love you as much as every star in the night sky. You're my sun that I revolve around. You complete me."

Some of what he said really did bother me but I ignored it."Is all that you said just now true?That's how you feel?"

"Every word,"he looked at me and said. He put his hand behind my neck pulled me in and kissed me.

"I really do love you monkey,"I said after he kissed me and his hand still behind my neck.

"I know," he said and kissed me again.

"So, you're perfectly fine with me having a baby?"

"As long as it's ours then I couldn't care less."

I was surprised at his reaction to the entire situation. He was more calm than I expected him to be. But I was happy that he accepted it so easily. I thought I was going to be happy for a change. But eventually i learned that I was not able to be happy. Not with the life I was living.