I'm Not Okay: My Chem/Gerard Way

But I Swear She's Perfect For Me

Bea.

I wake up and the first thing I see is Ray sitting up, with Sweeney still on top of his fro. But he's asleep. I can't help but giggle at the site.

Frank turns over and groans, he opens his eyes, and starts laughing. Causing Gerard and Mikey to wake up along with Sweeney who has now stood up on top of Ray's head and is in attack position.

"Oh shit." Frank says, slowly scooting away from Ray. Ray wakes up and turns his head causing the cat to mount to his head with its claws.

"You little!" Ray exclaims taking Sweeney off of his head on placing him on the ground.

I get up and walk into the kitchen followed by Gerard, and to my aunt who is holding a pack of ramen noodles. We basically live off of those things.

"You guys want something to eat?" She asks.

"No I'm good..." Gerard's cute smile, turns around into a disappointed frown.

"Uh... I lied... I do want something..." My aunt turns around and looks at me, with a kind of shocked expression.

"You know what? We can always go get something. How does that sound? You can even bring your friends along." My aunt knows I haven't been eating, I can tell, she would normally act as if she were tight on money, she'd never tell me I could bring my friends along to a restaurant.

"Uh. Okay..." I say. I start to walk up the stairs to my brothers room.

"I forgot to tell you, Zak went to a friends house." My aunt says. I nod, then turn around and go to my room.

"My aunt wants to take us out for lunch, how does that sound?"

"We'll go." Frank says turning to Ray and Mikey. They just nod.

"Okay now. Shoo shoo, I need to change." I say gesturing for them to leave.

Once they leave i quickly throw on black skinny jeans, a KISS shirt, and my converse. I open my door, then go into the little bathroom. I open up my little makeup pouch and take out my eyeshadow and liner.

I chose almost black eyeshadow then draw on some eyeliner. I put them back into the pouch, then feel something sharp prick my finger. I look down to see that shiny piece of metal I haven't used in over a month. I take it out and stare at it. My reflection beaming at me.

I think it might be time to rid myself of it.

"What if I need it later?" I whisper to myself.

"No, that'll be breaking the promise." I argue back. I quickly wrap it in a reasonable layer of toilet paper. "Good riddance." I whisper, flushing it down the toilet. I walk out of the bathroom and am engulfed in a hug.

"Thank you." Gerard says.

"Thank you, for being my mentor." I smile, feeling warm inside.

"I want you to know something..." He says, leaning out from the hug.

"What?" I ponder.

"You never have to hurt yourself to feel better.  I'm always going to be there for you... I swear you're the most beautiful person I've ever seen, on the inside and out." Before I can even comprehend what he has just said, he takes my face into his hands and attaches our lips.

I smile into the kiss as my heart flutters. We pull back and he gives me a toothy grin. "Will you- Uh, like to be my girl friend." He asks nervousness shining through his voice. I nod happily, "Of course!" I wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him again.

We pull apart as we hear clapping coming from behind us. We both turn around to see Mikey, with a huge grin on his face. 

"Yay!" He cheers.

"You were watching the whole time?!" Gerard asks.

"For most of it... But, hey! Let's not worry about that, instead look at how happy you guys look!" I look in the large mirror in front of us. We do look happy. Super happy, It's been a really long time since I've felt this way.

"You wanna know just how much he talks about you sometimes, like fucking shit, Bea. I've seen him have small crushes, but damn. You guys are like a perfect match." He blabbers. I blush. 

He's perfect.

*A/N: Yay... In case you don't know where I got the title from its Memphis May Fire, Miles Away feat. Kellin Quinn. If you liked this chapter then you should do that jazzy shat you do when you like stuff c:*