Me & Gwen Stacy

three

A/N: It's been a whilleeee lol I know I don't have much readers, but if you are into this story here's a short update for you (:

-three-

Peter POV

We were walking together through the city and no matter how much I tried I couldn't resist taking her small hand in mine. I really wanted to be professional about it. Or maybe not professional, but serious. I wanted her to know one hundred percent that I was serious about our relationship, and it wasn't just about the physical level. I needed her emotionally.

I breathed a soft sigh of relief as she squeezed my hand affectionately saying the words that we couldn't- didn't know how to say out loud.

"Peter?" she breathed my name as we neared the park.

"Mmm?"

She took a deep breath, "I can't do this."

My face fell. Was this how it felt for your heart to break? Caused it seemed less figurative than I thought. Was it supposed to feel like my ribs were giving up and crashing down on my lungs? Was it supposed to feel like my lungs were toppling over into my heart? Was I supposed to feel like everything was crashing down from the inside out? Because, I was imploding. My heart slowed down and dropped to my stomach then started beating eratically. I could barely breathe. Was she done with me? With us? I could feel my hands-- cold with dread and impending defeat-- slipping from hers as they became clammy.

"I want you so badly. But, I can't. I just- I don't want you to break my heart again. I want you to be here for me, and I know it's selfish, but, I can't play second to the city... I can't keep up with all the worrying..." She was crying now, and dammit I was about to start crying too.

"I would always worry about my dad. I never knew if he was coming home. And now... you. I-" but her voice gave way to tears.

I stood there for an eternity, as seconds bled into minutes and into hours, and months and years and they say you see your life flash before your eyes when you die, but I saw it then. I saw my entire existence before Gwen-- miserable and lonely as it was-- completely consume my bright future that revolved around her. I saw my past present and now dull future flash before me as time seemed to collapse on itself. But I'm sure it was only a few seconds, a minute. Everything was in slow motion and I couldn't seem to focus on anything but the shiny tears that slide down Gwen's smooth cheeks and the sharp pain tearing me up inside. It was much worse than what any villain could do to me.

Gwen POV

I don't know how, or when I decided this, I'm not sure if I even really thought it over fully before the words tumbled out of my mouth in a whisper,

"Peter?"

"Mmm?"

I shuddered in a deep breath trying to figure out what to say to him to let him know how I felt, "I can't do this."

He didn't respond to me out loud, but his whole demeanor changed. His eyes glazed over as he looked at the ground, his hands were hidden away in his pockets and his mouth was in a firm line.

"I want you so badly. But, I can't. I just- I don't want you to break my heart again. I want you to be here for me, and I know it's selfish, but, I can't play second to the city... I can't keep up with all the worrying..." my voice cracked and I mentally kicked myself. How could I let him go when he was finally reaching out to me? How could I be so weak? "I would always worry about my dad. I never knew if he was coming home. And now.. you. I-" I couldn't look at him. I felt like there was a whole world between us. And maybe there was. He was a superhero. He saved people and was responsible in a way for them. I was just a silly crush. Compared to his extraordinary life, I was simply ordinary. Something regular, which seemed out of place for Spider-man. 

I wanted to walk away. The silence was too cold, and stiff. The dry, bitterly cold air twined with my uffocating guilt was choking me. But my feet were lead. 

"Okay," his voice was hoarse, "that was your side- what you had to say. I still have a couple things to say."

I squeezed my eyes shut as his hands wrapped around my wrists and he pulled me to him so that the toe of my boots were flush against his sneakers. Chills flared up on my arms, and it wasn't because of the cold. His hands were warm and strong as he whispered, "I need you Gwen. I love you. I want you to need me too."

A/N: So I was told it should go more slow, more "angsty" so here ya go. I'm sorry it's short btw... too short? blahhhh idk What do you think? My attempt at slow and angsty lol thanks for the reviews and i'd love to get more. Seriously they don't even take that long and they make my daaaaayyy (: so R&R

R&R
R&R
R&R

~luckyon3