Our Simple Sins

Chapt. 1

As I lay in the dark, the feeling of absolute emptiness starts to drown me.

It feels like endless waves of sorrow and despair are engulfing me. Making it impossible to breathe, hear, or see. Much less speak.

That, is what true depression feels like. The feeling of constantly swimming against the tide. Day by day, it takes the little energy you have left, and throws it all away.

What I'm trying to say is I was laying down, all alone, empty and wasted. I looked over at my dim screened phone to see that I got a text. It said it was from my friend Abigale.

Abigale is a light, bubbly girl, who calls herself "pastel emo". Her hair is bright pink and she has a collection of different colored, styled, and shaped chokers in her bedroom. In a very rare once in awhile, you will see her wearing something not skeleton or band related. Other than that she's perfectly "preppy" acting.

The text said, "Hey! What are you doing currently?", I sighed and then replied,

"I'm wallowing in self pity, you?"

Abigale was my only friend so I tried not to bore her away. I have extreme trust issues so I don't call a lot of people my "friend". To be completely honest, I don't really know what a "friend" is.

Anyways, she quickly responded, "I'm at a party, you should totally come down here!"

I felt my gut clench, "You know how I feel about social situations, Abigale"

It took her awhile to respond, she ended up FaceTiming me.

"Hey dude!", Abigale shouted through the screen, "This party totally fucking rocks!!"

I just rolled my eyes.

"Come on man, live a little." She pretended to quiver her lip and made her famous puppy eyes.

"No, Abigale", I quickly interrupted, "you know those eyes don't work on me."

She grunted and then said, "Come onnnnnn", she put an emphasis on the on, "I want my bestie here."

Back again with the puppy eyes.

"Fine.", I hesitantly agreed, "I'll come, where is this place anyways?"

She smiled a big toothy grin, "It's at 4933 Shell St. I'll see you in a bit." She hung up.

I rolled myself out of bed and looked at my alarm clock. Shit, Abigale it's 11:09, who goes to a party on Monday and stays till 11:09?

I walked into the bathroom and sighed in disgust. "No wonder I've been single for over a year."

I threw on a My Chemical Romance t-shirt and some ripped up, old, black skinny jeans. My hair looked fine which was a relief and my makeup wasn't looking bad either.

I went to tell my mom that I was leaving, but like always she was passed out drunk on the couch, so I just left a note.

Grabbing my car keys off of the counter, I quietly opened the door and left, locking it behind me.

I'm 16 in case you were wondering.

When I got to the address Abigale gave me, I stared in repulsion. It was clear that a party was going on. There were beer bottles scattered all over the yard, and there was loud music playing. Teenagers were screaming and dancing. It was horrifying, I started to have a panic attack.

Before I could let my demons catch up to me, I saw Abigale.

"Robin!" She screamed.

I groaned when I realized what I agreed to. "Why am I so damn stupid?" I mumbled.

My name is Robin, some call me emo, others call me a faggot. Whatever you choose to label me as, really for the people who call me faggot, you're not entirely wrong. I am gay, yes I will admit that. But I think the term "faggot" is a bit derogatory.

I'm telling you all of this so you get the full visual of my ugly self.

I'm an anorexic, flippy black haired, scrawny little shit. That's what my sister calls me anyways. I generally dress in all black, sometimes you'll catch me wearing grey if you're lucky. I'm extremely self cautious and I have a small but growing phobia of people.

My friends say that I look a bit like Andy Biersack, in fact everyone says that I look like him, but I think he's hot. And I am far from that, even though everyone disagrees.

That's enough description, I don't want any of you to vomit.

So back to the story.

I walked over to Abilale, "Hi..."

"Hey dude!!!!! You're gonna love this party. There are so many cute boys." She waggled her eyebrow at me.

I just sighed.

"Bro, come on. You can't live your life in regret and fear. Let's go inside." She grabbed my wrist and dragged me indoors. The smell of vomit, alcohol, weed, and sweaty teens instantly entered my nose. It absolutely repulsed me.

Abigale must of felt that my muscles tensed.

"Aww, it's okay Rob. I'll be with you the whole time, if anyone gives you shit I'll rip their throats out." She gave me a cute innocent smile.

For a small girl she was quite intimidating.

Now, I'm about 5'5 and I'm weak. Anyone could see that I have absolutely no muscle mass. So I'm about as easy to pick on as a small puppy.

We walked to the kitchen, and Abigale gave me a drink. I trusted her, so I knew it wasn't spiked with anything I wouldn't want going into my body.

I accepted it, "Thanks.."

She grinned.

"Wanna go sit on the couch?"

I just nodded, so she pulled me over to the crusty, nasty smelling, yellow couch.

I cringed before I sat down, praying that I didn't sit on vomit. I thankfully didn't.