New Girl

Alone.

I look over at the clock on the walk over the window, I read 12:17am. The doctor came over once more,
"Hun, is anyone coming?"
She asked in a soft kind voice
"no..."
I said as I looked down at the ground than back up at her.
Her eyebrows got closer together as her eyes squinted. She walked over and sat beside me.
"I'll stay"

Hours pass again and I started dozing off until I fall asleep.
All the sudden I hear a voice I feel someone's hand on my shoulder, I slowly opened my eyes. It was blurry, I closed my eyes again then opened them right after. It was an older lady she had her eyes closed and was leaning on my arm, I turned my head to my left and saw the doctor was gone.
"Excuse me?"
I say as I slowly move my arm
"oh sorry Hun! I was praying."
she said as tears came down her face.
I took a deep breath and looked at her with a questioning look.
"Oh jeez, I'm your grandmother"
"well hi"
She gave me a small huge and sat back into her seat. I looked at the clock and read 3:52am,
"25 minutes huh?"
I said with opened eyes staring at the clock.
"I'm sorry darling"
she said ask she laid her hand on my shoulder.
"don't be sorry, I understand completely"
"what do you me-"
"You don't care, you don't want me, you didn't have to come and pretend like you care!"
I voice got louder and people started to stare. I got up and walked across the room to another chair before she could speak.
She's not my family, she doesn't know me, she doesn't care I thought to myself.
She's probably like everyone else. thinking they have to sit with me and hold me because my mothers dying. It's just like the separation, Neighbors, friends parents, family friends just sit with you and hold your hand thinking it's helping, little do they know it's not.
I look over at her and see she's crying, tears down her face, holding her head up with her hand by leaning on the arm of the chair.
The doctor that sat down beside me earlier walked in the door and walked up to me.
"You're still here huh"
she said as she sat down,
"and your back"
I said looking at the ground,
she was young maybe 27 at the most, probably a intern.
"well this is when my day starts"
She turned her head to the ground as well.
I put my hands on my knees and leaned back.
"I just wanna go home"
I said closing my eyes.
"go"
she said quietly,
"I'll take your number and call you when your mother wakes up"
she continued.
"are you sure?"
I didn't care if she was sure, I was going to go anyway.
"yes you need to go quick, this could get me in a lot of trouble"
I stood up and gave her my number. I started walking to the elevator but I could feel her eyes on me, not the doctor but my grandmother. As I walked out of the building I heard a voice,
"Kennedy where are you going?"
the voice was familiar.
"Home!"
I yelled.
"Alone?"
it was my grandmother,
"let me take you"
she spoke again.
I stopped,
"I don't need you!"
I said in a loud but soft voice.
She walked up to me and grabbed my arm like I was her young child trying to run away. I tugged my arm away,
"stop trying!"
I yelled,
"You called me!"
She yelled back with angry
"I wouldn't of hand to if you're daughter wasn't such a mess up!"
as soon as I said this I knew I should have,
she didn't reply.
"I'm sorry,"
I said as I walked up to her and gave her a one arm hug.
"we're ok"
said as she kept her arm around me and we walked to a grey minivan.
"what's the address I'll take you home?"
she said as we got in the car.
I gave her the address and we drove to my house,
"can I call you something other than grandma, it just doesn't seem right at the moment."
I asked before I stepped out of the car,
"just call me G it will be our short form for grandma"
I nodded and stepped out.
I walked over to the drivers door and thanked her.
she started driving away and I walked up to the door.
Was I ready for this? an empty house, the puddle of blood, the knife and my terrible lonely thoughts.

It was cold, the late October weather in Canada was nothing like in California. I put my hand on the door and turned it, the door was unlocked since we basically ran out. I stepped inside, it was cold, empty and lonely. I shut the door behind me and put my phone down on the counter and flicked the lights on, the brightness was too much for my eyes.
Boxes filled the rooms in the house, I sat down on the floor by a box and opened it. Pictures said the box, I pulled out a couple pictures and looked at them. Two young adults young and in love, a man and a woman, my mother and father. They seemed happy, what happened?