Addiction (Lashton)

Chapter One

It's not about reciprocation it's just all about me, A sycophantic, prophetic, Socratic junkie wannabe

***

Holding the cigarette in my hand, I lifted it to my lips, inhaling and then exhaling the smoke. Watching as the smoke rose and then disappeared into nothingness.

Sometimes I wished I could disappear.

Taking another drag, I watched over the people at my university rushing to get to their next lecture.

"Smoking is bad for you, you know." A voice said from behind me. I jumped. I turned around and noticed it was the boy at the party, Ashton.

"Jesus, you scared me." He laughed however I still failed to see the funny side of it.

"We are all going to die anyway. May as well speed along the process." I shrugged, nonchalantly. Death was never a big deal to me, I never really understood the big taboo over it. For me death is peace. Death is the only escape where you can relax for eternity, unlike drugs that only last a few hours.

"Well shit," Ashton said. "That's depressing."

I took another drag.

"Surely there's something you want to live for? Something that makes you happy." Ashton pressed. "Or someone?"

I laughed. "Why would I want to live in this god forsaken world that's full of absolute darkness for anybody? Now that's just suicidal."

"Is that why you take drugs?"

I turned to face him. Shocked that he had made that assumption. I mean it was correct but was I that easy to decipher?

"What?" I said, acting like I had no idea what he was talking about.

"Is that why you take drugs, to forget, to escape?" Ashton said. His voice was rather timid, maybe it was because I was glaring at him and I had a reputation of being rather aggressive.

I threw my cig on the floor and crushed it under the toe of my shoe. "I have a lesson to get to. Goodbye, Ashton." 

It irked me because he was right. 

I hated people being right. 

So I left. I left like the coward was. 

It was no surprise, really. My father was a coward, so it wasn't much surprise I followed in his footsteps. I had always been a coward and drugs was the only way that helped with not just the pain and the thoughts, for a little bit I was confident. I was who I wanted to be and that made me happy. For just a little bit, I could be happy and free and live in a delusion. 

I knew I couldn't live in a delusion forever but I would rather avoid the harsh reality for as long as possible. 

***

"Are you actually going to join us tonight or are you going to ditch us again?" Jake remarked. I rolled my eyes. 

"Shut up and pass me the needle." I said.

It was like an instant high, the feeling washed over me taking complete control of me and drowning me in bliss. Once I was done, I walked downstairs in search for someone to fuck. It was a repetitive cycle, get drunk, get high, fuck someone into the mattress. 

Walking around, I eyed the selection of people however none really caught my eye. I was never really picky but tonight, nobody seemed fit for what I wanted. Either I had already slept with them or they seemed boring and I didn't do boring, no matter how desperate I was. 

Whilst I was walking around I bumped into someone. 

That someone being Ashton. 

"We have to stop meeting like this, princess." Ashton blushed. 

I leaned closer to him so our faces were closer together, a smirk painted my lips as my hand grazed his crotch and I noticed how flustered he got. I always loved how I could have anyone wrapped around my finger. 

"Wanna go upstairs?" I suggested, a smirk still tugging at my lips as Ashton nodded rather breathlessly. 

When we found an empty room, Ashton was quick to tug off his shirt and I was soon kissing down his neck. Ashton moaned when I kissed just above his collarbone, I gently bit in the exact spot and smiled proudly at the red mark knowing that tomorrow it would blow up into a bruise. 

"Don't tease." He pouted. If I wasn't so turned on I would have found it cute. 

My lips found his next. The kiss was passionate and full of lust, my tongue grazed over his lip making him moans. "I love how responsive you are to me." 

"Shut up and take your clothes off and fuck me." I raised an eyebrow, chuckling but did as he said. 

Once we were both out of our clothes, I kissed down his chest loving every moan and gasp that fell from his lips. 

I thrust two of my fingers in front of him. "Suck." Once I was satisfied they were coated with enough saliva, I pushed one of them in slowly, wanting to tease him. My free hand pumped his half hard dick.

"One day I'll get you to prep yourself for me. You can finger yourself for me and give me a show. Won't you baby?" He moaned, pushing his body onto my fingers and I smirked and pushed my second finger in. "You're so good for me, aren't you?" 

"Luke.... Luke, please more- I need more." Ashton panted.

I kissed him and reached over into my pocket of my jeans where I kept my condoms and pulled one out. I rolled it onto me before I lined up with Ashton. I then placed his legs around my waist and pushed into him. With a hand on the headboard and a hand holding his hips I thrust into him. 

Ashton scratched at my back and I moaned as he did so. "Faster. Please-God- Faster. Holy shit Luke."

"Fuck Ash." I buried my head in his neck as thrusted into him, my thrusts increasing in speed almost like a jack hammer. I bit his neck moaning as he scratched at my back. "You feel so good." 

"Im gonna-" Ashton never got to finish his sentence as he lifted his hips up to meet mine, his head thrown back onto the pillows and he came. I continued to thrust into him until I came too. I buried my head once again into his neck moaning his name as I released into the condom. 

"Is now a right time to ask if you want to get pancakes?" Ashton said. 

I laughed. "Probably not but I've had weirder said to me whilst I am still inside of someone." 

"Well then get out of me and then take me for pancakes."

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