Addiction (Lashton)

Chapter Five

This chapter is a bit bipolar but it describes Luke's messed up mind perfectly. Also sorry for the wait! I've had my AS exams but I've now finished with them so I'm going to be writing and updating on a regular basis again. 

Chapter Five

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Waking up in a strange room was normal for me but waking up in Ashton's arms was a little strange for me. Usually he would leave not long after. But this, this was nice. It was something as simple as cuddling yet I felt so loved and cared for. 

Whenever I was around him, I always felt cared for. Yeah he may be just as sarcastic as I was yet he always took the time to ask about me, about my day. Simple easy things that not even my own family were capable of doing. They stopped caring about me a long time ago, I wouldn't be surprised if they had forgotten about me altogether. 

"Morning. How are you feeling?" Ash asked when I started to get up out of bed. "Not so fast, you need to rest after last night. Im surprised you are still alive. You scared me you know, Hemmings." 

"Sorry." I chuckled as I did as I was told, lying down. My head felt way too heavy for my shoulders and my stomach was churning. The after affects of last night finally hitting me at full force now I had woke up fully. 

"So you should be!" He exclaimed. "Don't do that to me again. Now, do you want some water? Anything to eat?" 

"Water would be good." I replied, Ashton nodded and went to get me a bottle of water from the mini fridge in his room. "Actually, would it be okay if we went out for a walk? I need some fresh air." 

Ashton nodded again. "Sure. As long as you're feeling up to it."

I rolled my eyes. "I'm fine, honestly. It's cute how much you worry about me, baby."

"Shut up." He muttered although a blush sprung up onto his cheeks. It was cute how easy I could get under his skin. Shows just how I had him wrapped right around my finger. 

Smirking, I followed him out of his room and down to the local park which was only a five minute walk. Once I was met with fresh air I felt instantly more refreshed, being cooped up in a bedroom was not good, no matter however much I enjoyed it. As me and Ashton sat down on the grass, making small talk every now and again he would look over at me, with worried glances. Despite my teasing earlier, it was nice to know somebody cared enough to worry about my wellbeing. 

I watched on as happy families crowded around the play area as their child ran free, jumping from the swing to slide and to the rest of the things that it had to offer. I noticed how happy couples walked hand in hand as their dog ran off, chasing after a chewed up, wet tennis ball to bring back to their owners who would smile and rub the dog's back as they retrieved the ball from the dog's mouth only to throw it again, repeating the process. 

That was something I craved. I craved the security of a simple, happy life. Growing up I was never used to happy families. I was used to arguments, sleeping in one house on the weekdays and then another at the weekends. Stability was strange to me, normality was just as strange. So I rebelled. I pushed myself away from my parents, not like they cared anyway, and I turned out like this. A self-loathing, self-destructive person that was way past saving. 

"You've gone quiet." Ashton noted. "What are you thinking about?" 

I shrugged. "How my life sucks." 

"Wanna talk about it?" I shook my head. "No. I'm not really one for talking about my feelings and all that shit." 

"Okay. Stay repressed then." 

"I'm not repressed, I'd rather not speak about personal issues. Besides, I've never been one to articulate my feelings." I shrugged. Ashton nodded as if he understood what I meant. 

Ashton stayed quiet, chewing on his lip. Seemingly lost in his thoughts just like I had been moments ago. "Can I show you something?" 

"Ashton, if you're going to get your dick out I wouldn't recommend it. I mean there are kids about and you would get arrested for peadophilia." Ashton thumped my arm but laughed anyway. 

"Shut up you cock." He giggled. "No. There's somewhere I want to show you."

Before I could answer he had grabbed my hand and he was taking me somewhere across the park. All I could think about is the feel of his hand in mine. It fit perfectly, almost (as cheesy as it sounded) like it was made for my hand. Despite the callouses on his fingers, his hand was so soft and when we reached the destination and Ashton let go of my hand I couldn't help but feel a little empty. 

It was silly really. I shouldn't have felt that happy about him holding my hand, we've done more than that but something simple as that made my heart race. 

I looked around and I noticed that he had taken me to a pond. The pond was secluded by several large weeping willow trees and was right at the back of the park. There was a couple of picnic tables, one on either side of the pond which you could only access by walking the long way around the pond. 

"I come here a lot, when I need time to think. Especially when my anxiety is bad." Ashton spoke up. He had sat down on the grass and he was looking out at the pond. "It helps a lot. I don't know why but something about it, it just instantly calms me." 

"It's nice here. I can see why you like it." I said nodding.

Sitting down next to Ashton, I watched as he looked transfixed on the beauty view of the pond but me, I was transfixed on the beauty of him. His hair, now a little too long, blowing in his face, his eyelashes casting a shadow on his cheekbones and his hazel eyes taking in the view. I could stare at him all day. 

This didn't go unnoticed by him. "Didn't you ever get taught that it's rude to stare? Besides you should be looking at the view!" 

"I am doing." I smiled cheekily and watched as a blush covered his ears and then spread to his cheeks. Ashton bashfully ducked his head down, a small smile spread across his face making his dimples pop out. Making him blush was something I had come to love, seeing him so coy was so adorable to me.