Camille Syanna
I was arranging the flowers I picked outside in an old vase I found upstairs when ZA came down. I woke up with a bitching headache from drinking last night and a couple of hours ahead of him. Hindi na rin kasi ako mapakali habang natutulog siya sa tabi ko kanina. Kaya inabala ko na lang ang aking sarili sa pamimitas ng bulaklak sa labas. Isa pa, I missed arranging flowers and making things prettier.
I couldn't say if what happened last night was a mistake because if it was, I wanted it. It was something I did hastily, a spur of the moment, but I wanted it. ZA and I were both controlled by passion and our own desires. And I felt a little embarrassed to admit that it was me who wanted more. If ZA hadn't stopped and taken control of the situation, things that couldn't be undone might have happened.
"Do you want to eat?" ZA asked.
I shook my head in response. Mas na itinuon ko ang aking atensyon sa ginagawa. ZA had sunflowers and roses in his backyard. I wasn't sure if he knew that, but it was beautiful outside.
"Are you sure?" He probed.
Tumango ako. I didn't know what to tell him, or how to speak to him after last night. Lord, I couldn't even look at him! Pakiramdam ko'y malulusaw ako sa pagkapahiya sakaling gagawin ko iyon.
"That looks beautiful," ZA commented on what I was doing. And as if his presence weren't enough, he walked up to me and took the space beside me. "Where did you get them?"
See? He didn't know he had them in his backyard. "Outside,"
"It's beautiful, Cams."
I shrugged. Bright colors such as reds and oranges tend to pair well with yellow. "It would be even better with snapdragons and chrysanthemums."
"Have you always been this good with flowers?" He asked.
"When I was younger we had a huge garden in our house. Mom would grow orchids, roses, tulips, and sunflowers. And I'd always loved watching them grow." I told him with a smile on my face as I finish the arrangement. "I used to pick a stem or two every day to display in my room. I always thought flowers make everything more beautiful than they already were."
"That was how you became a florist..."
"I loved the aesthetics," I said. "And how they bloomed wildly."
"If you were a flower, what would you be?" ZA asked.
"A rose," I could see in his reaction that he expected my answer. "Because roses are so beautiful you wouldn't see the pain of thorns in it."
He nodded, inching closer to me. "But to me, you're a wildflower. You allow yourself to grow in all the places people thought you never would."
"Do you really think I'm growing?" I turned to look at him. "You're not just saying that because of what happened the other night?"
I regretted asking him that question the very moment it slipped out of my mouth.
"Why? What happened last night?" ZA teased. I didn't like the way he was making his voice sound rough. Our arms brushed and that made me more tense. "Hmm?"
I really wished God would knock me off my feet, and I would fall to the ground, head first. But I didn't see that happening sooner because images of last night came flooding my precious memory.
I was already naked above the bed when I looked up at ZA. He undressed me in a matter of seconds, proving how he had mastered everything in this department.
ZA took his time staring at me. It was as if he was trying to engrave me in his memory. His eyes were greener with desire and intense want. That only made me feel hotter! My hands were on the verge of pulling the sheets over my body, but I wanted ZA to see me. I wanted him to look. God, I wanted him to do more than just that.
