Six Years Of Change

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I've looked in the Mirror of Erised six times in my life, never once seeing the same thing. However that's not so strange as I only look once a year and a lot of things have changed in the last six years. Now as I sit here with her crying on my shoulder I have a chance to reflect.

At the beginning of the first year we were barely civil to one another. I thought she was too clever for her own good, now I see it was just that she was cleverer than me. When Harry took me to the mirror I saw myself the best of all my brothers; I was the one above everyone else.

Second year brought the basilisk attacks. When she was petrified I couldn't talk to anyone, I didn't know what to say. She was my best friend and she shouldn't be in pain; I needed her with me. I snuck down to find the mirror and it showed me what I truly wanted; her safe and happy. She was my best friend, what other reason could there be for me to see that image in a mirror of hearts desires?

We finally had a brilliant defence against the dark arts teacher in our third year, but his end of term exam greatly upset my best friend. The boggart showed her failing her exams so funnily enough when I visited the mirror it showed me helping her study and pass all her tests. Again she's my friend; of course I want to help her. I didn't tell anyone what the boggart showed me, I didn't want to even think about my best mates dead let alone talk to them about it.

The Triwizard Tournament in year four brought the biggest change in me, and in her. Victor Krum came onto the scene and took my place, as her male friend obviously. When I looked in the mirror after the Yule Ball all I saw was myself strangling Krum with her cheering me on. When I got back to the dormitory I realised she wouldn't be happy so I vented my anger on my model. He wouldn't be able to dance with her with no arms now would he?

Fifth year brought Harry's first kiss with Cho. I didn't know why I was jealous at the time; I sure didn't want to kiss Cho. The mirror showed me why. I was kissing my best friend. But I didn't fancy her. It was just because I was lonely, nothing else.

Everything made sense at the beginning of this year. I was lonesome so I found someone. Lavender was very nice but we couldn't talk, it was all kissing. I realised when I looked in the Mirror of Erised that I had to break-up with Lavender, my future was with my best friend. The mirror showed my married with kids; I couldn't lie to myself anymore.

So here I am, with her on my shoulder. So much has happened. Does she like me? Will I ruin everything? She looks like she needs comfort but what if I just upset her?

I've waited six years to understand how I feel for her; surely a little while longer can't hurt. When the time comes however what will I say? How can I voice what I feel?

I'm in love with Hermione Granger.

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