Dead Without You ~ Jerrie Thirlwards (Sequel to Dead To Me)

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Perrie woke up the next day cuddled into Jesy's side, smiling. She didn't feel quite as weak as before, but she still wouldn't be able to walk. She could feel Leigh-Anne on her other side, snoring softly, the vibrations shivering down the bare portion of her back where her shirt rode up in her sleep.

She gently shook Jesy's side, startling her so she woke up.

"Huh? No Jake, I won't—oh, it's you." Jesy said, rubbing sleep from her eyes. Perrie did the same to Leigh-Anne, but got vastly different results.

"Jordan, why would you want me to do that? We're in Mahiki, in public. That's disgusting." She murmured, turning to face the other two girls.

"Leigh, babe, wake up." Jesy said, shaking her slightly. Leigh snorted as she shot up, eyes wide.

"What the h---, guys?!" Leigh-Anne shrieked.

"Perrie wants to get up. So therefore, we get up." Jesy explained, a goofy grin on her face.

Leigh nodded, leaning down and hugging Perrie. "Thats fine, love. Tell me next time. I'll set an alarm."

Perrie wheezed as she laughed, causing Jesy's eyes to widen in concern. She scurried off into Perrie's kitchen and got a warm rag, some bland toast, and a glass of water, and struggled to carry them back into Perrie's room. Jesy gently set the warm rag on Perrie's forehead and set the water and toast on her bedside table.

Perrie mustered up a smile for Jesy's sake, but anyone could tell that she was the opposite of happy. "I wanna write, Jesy." She whispered, frowning. Jesy's eyes glanced around the room in search of Perrie's notebook, her bottom lip tucked between her teeth in concentration.

Perrie spoke up, sputtering a bit. "It's in my bedside drawer. Of course, I'm in the middle of the bed, so I can't reach it." Jesy pulled open the drawer and grabbed the notebook and the pen laying beside it, handing it to Perrie, who struggled to sit up.

Perrie tapped her pen against her lips for a few moments before she started scribbling on a blank page.

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Dear Jade,

God, I'm in so much pain. I'm going to push through it with the hopes that there will be even a sliver of a chance that we can be together again. It's the thought of you, of your love, that's what keeps me going.

I'll continue to think of you every day, and knowing you, you're probably remorseful over what you've done. I'd just like to let you know that I forgive you. I'll always forgive you. You've broken my heart, but who am I kidding, you're supposed to move on. As long as you're happy, nothing else matters. That's all I could ever want for you. Happiness. As long as there's a smile on your face, I'm content. I wouldn't care if you left me behind and found someone better. God knows you deserve better than me. You'd be happier without me. You are happier without me.

You are a part of me, and that's to be expected. We were unbelievably close within a few months of meeting each other. I fell too hard, too fast. I was head over heels from day one. It's not very hard to tell I was whipped. I still am. I won't be insensitive and say that you don't care for me anymore, when I know that isn't true.

It's hard without you, it really is, but I have my friends to help me through it. I hope that one day soon we're able to at least be friends again. It gets oddly quiet at night, but I guess I'm still used to your soft snores that would lull me to sleep. My heart isn't whole without you, but I'm strong enough to go on. I hope.

I love you Jade. I really miss you.

Love, Perrie

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