Love, Light and Blood (Owari No Seraph)

Chapter 8: Tears

When will this end? When will I be able to forget this pain? I'd rather just die. If I did, I could be with Mika once more. But, I highly doubt that. Not with what I am.

"Siri, you belong to me, you know that right?" That same voice continued to speak to me. I opened my eyes and standing before me was that familiar blonde that I had loved for years. I blinked and a dazed smile formed on my lips. As I slowly opened my eyes once more, the blonde was gone and standing before me was the one person I didn't want to see. Krul Tepes. She held my face close to hers as sweat dripped down my forehead. I drew in a shaky breath as I pulled my head out of her grasp.

"They're all lies!" I screamed.

"Why do you do this to yourself?" Krul said in a strangely calm voice.

I fell to the floor and felt a burning pain in my head. Almost as if I wanted to start crying. "I--I don't... know.."

The thoughts in my head were completely unintelligible. The pieces all just floating around in my mind. I held my hands to my head as one familiar memory, surfaced up from the mess. That familiar blonde haired boy's face. "M....Mika!?" I cried out. Sweat dripped down my face as my body shook.

"Please....somebody....save me!" I then felt a hand touch my hair and gently caress. I let out a soft sigh and my body immediately felt lighter. I didn't even want to look up to see who it was. But I did anyways. It was like my body wasn't following orders. I looked up to find no one there. I felt like I was going insane.

The light pouring in from the window behind me dimmed and dimmed. It felt as though time had been going especially slow at the moment. I struggled to my feet and looked around. I was alone. Completely alone. Yet, that hand on my head felt so real.

I took a step out of my room and looked down the hall, there was no one there either. Just what the hell was that? I shook it off and went up to the roof . As I opened the door, I was greeted with a gentle breeze blowing past me. I went up to the railing and leaned up against it. This was the only place where I could relax even just a little bit.

I closed my eyes and sighed softly. Slowly, as the long minutes passed by, I recollected my thoughts and my shoulders slumped.

I couldn't help but wonder of there was something that I was missing. It was as if there was something that I desperately needed to know. I needed answers to the questions I didn't even have. But where could I even find those answers? I turned around with my back against the railing and stayed there for a couple more minutes before deciding to go back inside. Impulsively, I found myself back where it all started, where I had lost my humanity and where I supposedly 'died'.

Horrendous memories came flooding in. My heart raced and I started to sweat. My knees began to buckle and I could see that same scene play out in front of me. The splatters of blood and the heavy thuds of dead bodies. And it all happened while I...did nothing. Nothing at all, because I was just too scared. I felt so useless and ashamed of myself, but no more than I do now, I'm simply a useless monster. The only thing I could do was eventually, die. Whether he died soon after I did, it didn't matter, as long as he could live even for a few more seconds.

"I figured you would be here, Siri."

I turned around to the source, Krul. The tapping of her shoes echoed up and down the grand hall as she came closer.

"I guess no one has ever told you, as if it was my job."

"Told me what?" I asked, now curious.

"I guess I must have skipped this on our first day of officially meeting each other. What do you really know about what happened four years ago? When the virus broke out, and the first appearance of vampires."