Foreign Exchange

Chapter 15

4 months later

I'm tired, I'm sad and devastated.

Niall leaves tomorrow

Fuck

Why the fuck did I get attached to him?

Why did I even asked him to hang out that day?

Why did we go to Applebee's?

Why did we go to the park afterwards?

And most importantly, why the fuck did I kiss him?

WHY?!

"Hey babe" he wrapped his arms around me while I was pretending to cook dinner.

"Hi" I turned around and fake smiled.

"Whatcha cooking" he leaned in and hid his head in my neck.

"Ugh who am I kidding, you know I can't cook. Can we just order pizza?" I chuckled as I moved away from him trying to hide my face.

I felt like crying and I haven't cried since I was 10 years old. I'm not even exaggerating it. When my father left me and my mother alone in this very house, I promised myself that I won't ever cry but here I am, on the verge of tears.

"Yeah sure love" he grabbed the house phone and called Pizza Hut while I just ran in the bathroom. That's the only thing I could think of.

I hate myself so much right now, what the fuck.

When he leaves, I'll be torn apart.
When he leaves, I'll be the one crushed.
When he leaves, I'll be the one crying in bed like those girls in movies when their boyfriend break up with them.
When he leaves, I'll be nothing.

Look, I never wanted to be one of the girls who are too dependent on their boyfriends.

"Babe?" I heard his voice grow louder and louder "babe?"

He knocked on the bathroom door and jiggled with the handle "are you okay?" He asked, I could hear the concern in his voice. When will I hear his beautiful voice again? Eh yeah we'll talk on the phone when he's in Ireland but long distance doesn't work, right?

I opened the door slowly and hugged him tightly without saying anything. He was about to say something but he just held me there. We sat down in front of the bathroom.

"What's going on babe?" He finally asked and I looked up at him with tear stained cheeks.

"You're gonna leave, I'm going to be alone. This is it" I sniffled not looking at him.

"Love, no no no no, don't say this" he kissed my cheek.

"I fucking love you and that's hard for me okay? I've never loved anyone. I've never let anyone in but the second day I met you, I kissed you. Why? I don't know but you just came in from Ireland and just ugh I don't even know what you did but you got me so hard and I ugh I'm so mad at myself right now, why did I fall for your Irish ass??" I could feel myself get heated it up "and and I told myself not to be those girls who just who get caught up with their boyfriends and I can't stop falling in love with you" I was about to tear up but he kissed me softly but roughly at the same time.

"I love you too Ash" those words just made me kiss him even more. I smiled in the kiss as he picked me up, I wrapped my legs around his waist as he led me to my bedroom. He laid me down softly, he pulled away slowly then his lips traveled down my neck leaving little hickeys making me moan. His hands exploring my whole body, he took my shirt off, he went back to kissing me. His kiss was so magical, made me feel like..like I actually matter.

He unhooked my bra while kissing me more roughly, my hands traveled down to his pants and unbuttoned his jeans, he pulled away and took his jeans off for me. I looked at him then down at his underwear, I think I was staring at his boner quite awhile because he chuckled took his boxers off.

"Hey, hey, I have a question" I chuckled "now this might sound stupid"

"What is it?" He looked at me smiling a little.

"Do...do all guys uhm name their penis?" I giggled a little.

He laughed a little too loudly and kissed me "oh I'm gonna miss you so much"

He took my thong off, I gasped as his cold fingers touched my clit. He smirked and kissed my neck as he slowly massaged it, I groaned and instantly wanted him in me.

"Fuck just do it" okay so this is my first time and I kind of wanted to get over it because I was kinda really scared. He smirked, he got in the position, I was nervous, you could tell that I was fucking nervous.

He looked down at me and smiled slightly, leaned in and kissed me softly but passionately, I kissed him back smiling in-between the kiss, my hands travelled up to his hair and my fingers automatically started twirling his hair.

He positioned himself and was ready to go "wait, we need a condom" I said as I opened the drawer on the night stand and began to look through it. I sighed with relief when I found one.

I gave it to him to put it on and looked away a little shy.

"Are you ready?" he whispered and I just nodded. I closed my eyes thinking it would hurt too much, when he finally slid in and started thrusting, I was kind of relieved because it didn't hurt that bad.

Naturally, I arched my back as he began to thrust faster and faster. He wrapped his left arm around my back supporting me. Soon enough, my moans turned into screams, we'll probably piss off the neighbors but right now that didn't matter.

I gripped on to his back probably leaving some marks, he bent down a little more to grab my left breast and started to nibble and suck on it.

"Fuck" I groaned loudly as soon as I came, I looked up at him and he seemed really pleased with himself. I bit my lip then leaned over a little and kissed him a bit roughly, I could feel his smirk in the kiss.

Shortly after, he came and slowly pulled out not breaking any eye contact. Our sweaty bodies against each other still. I don't want this moment to end. Soon, he'll be gone.

He pecked my lips and laid down beside me "I love you so much, Ash" he pulled me closer by my waist. I turned on my side to face him and smiled widely " I love you too".

"You should sleep, you have a flight to catch" I sighed and pulled the blanket over us.

He nuzzled his head in the crook of my neck like a baby and groaned "don't remind me now".

I smiled slightly and kissed his forehead "Goodnight love", I closed my eyes and fell asleep almost instantly.