Unlocking the door to the apartment she lived in, Stevie hesitated for a moment, her hand on the handle, before going inside. She knew exactly the way the place was going to look like and she was beyond sick of it, but lately she was getting increasingly more tired of trying to change anything.
Entering at last, she sighed, tossing her keys into a bowl by the door and then kicking off her shoes. She also pulled the scarf from around her neck and took off her coat, hanging it. She could hear the TV on in the small living room, which she passed by, walking into the kitchen and saw the pile of dirty dishes from dinner last night. She closed her eyes, suddenly feeling tears coming. She realized that a lot of people lived like this, but was it all she was worth? She had dreams, beautiful dreams, but they were shattered and here she was, living a life without much chance to change anything about it.
Putting the kettle on, Stevie moved on to looking through the fridge for something to make edible dinner with. Slamming the door, she straightened up and then felt a pair of arms hugging her, as she scrunched up her face.
"You reek. I'm still able to pay the bills, we do have running water."
"Oh come on, babe. You've just come home and all you can do is complain?"
"You also haven't washed the dishes nor gone to the grocery store."
"I'm so tired of you telling me the same thing every damn day!"
"Well, then do something about it, Brad!" She yelled, throwing her hands up in the air. "You're not the only one who's sick of living like this."
"What's wrong with how we live?"
"We barely have enough money, because you quit your job, trying to prove some stupid point. You don't work around this place at all, you don't clean up or make something to eat. All you do is lie on that fucking couch and chug down one beer after the other, watching whatever piece of shit they're showing on TV. I'm tired of doing everything on my own!" Stevie rarely ever expressed how she genuinely felt about something, but she truly had had enough.
"What is it that you do anyway?" Brad scoffed, folding his arms over his chest.
"You know what, I'm not going to do this with you if you're that dense." Stevie held her hands up in surrender and turned the stove off, walking past by him, heading to the bedroom to change into different clothes.
It didn't take very long of course before Brad showed up, lingering in the doorway, while Stevie paid no attention to him, pulling a shirt over her head. It wasn't that he was a bad man, he was just really oblivious to so many things, mostly everything that concerned her feelings. He thought he was right all the time as well and worst of all - he liked to drink and quite a lot.
"I'm sorry." He finally outed with it.
"I know you are." She shrugged. "But your apologies are worthless to me. I've heard you say those words too many times. I wish you stopped repeating them and started doing something about the whole situation instead, for instance - look for a job." While talking, Stevie gathered Brad's dirty clothes off the floor, dumping them into the hamper.
"But I-"
"Please. Please, don't say anything else, okay?" She asked, sitting down on the bed, wincing slightly as she put a hand over her abdomen.
"Are you still hurting?" Brad asked, genuinely concerned.
"Physically or emotionally?"
"Well, I know the answer to the latter, so..."
"Yeah." Giving a small nod. "It still hurts sometimes."
"Told you, you shouldn't have gone back to work so soon."
"I couldn't not. Where else are we going to get the money from?"
"Stevie..." Brad trailed off, sitting down next to her. "We just lost a baby, I'm sure if you asked-"
"No. I'm not going to ask anything and don't mention it again." She said, standing up on her feet. "I'm going to a buy groceries."
"You stay, I'll go." He offered, but she shook her head.
"I need to leave for a bit."
"Fine." Sighing, he wasn't going to fight her, knowing it was a loosing battle anyway.
After getting redressed, Stevie left the apartment, meeting an older woman, who lived close by, naturally, knowing every single thing that would happen during the day.
Smiling, Stevie greeted her. "Hello, Mrs. Smith."
"Hi, dear." The woman replied, looking around, as she then walked with Stevie, leaning in closer. "I saw something today."
"I'm sure you did." Stevie laughed lightly, but then she turned serious, hearing the next thing.
"Those men were here again."
Frowning, Stevie stopped turning her full attention to Mrs. Smith. "They were at our apartment?"
"Not exactly. Brad was getting the mail, when they arrived and basically dragged him outside. Now, I can't tell you what they were saying, because you know I have hearing problems, but they seemed angry to me."
This was the third time some men had come to have a word with Brad, which Stevie was never around for, only being told about it by Mrs. Smith. At first she didn't think of it much, but something told her this wasn't good after all. She was going to ask Brad about it.
"Thank you for letting me know, but I'm sure it's nothing to worry about." Stevie forced a smile, not wanting to alarm her neighbor.
On her way to the grocery store, Stevie couldn't stop thinking. Had Brad gotten himself into trouble? And if he did, was it serious? Sighing, she thought that nothing good had ever really come out of their relationship. He had helped her when she needed help, she loved him too, but was she happy? Did she honestly see their future together; getting married and having kids? Hardly. They had already failed one of the two...
Maybe it was time for her to finally start making those changes.
