Endlessly // R. Bortuzzo

Chapter 12

Robert's POV

Scarlett was in surgery when I first arrived. I didn't realize how long it would take them to operate, so I was sitting in the waiting room. I couldn't sit still, so eventually I got up and started walking around. I went into the chapel, hoping that God wouldn't judge me for not stepping in a church for a while.

They let me into the room after her surgery, but she wasn't conscious. She was beaten up pretty badly. Scratches and bruises everywhere, her left arm was in a sling. They told me her hip was broken. There was some bad internal bleeding, and they could only find one heartbeat.

Hers.

"So, you're saying that-"

"I'm sorry." The doctor told me. "She lost a lot of blood during the accident, the uterus was emptied. The only pain she will feel from the miscarriage, will be mental and emotional. Luckily, there wasn't any brain bleeding or damage." Ironic that I'd find that "lucky".

It was more waiting. They didn't know when she would wake up, if she did wake up. There were no guarantees. At this point nothing was guaranteed, even though the surgery was successful.

In all honesty, I don't know what to do when she wakes up. How do I tell her we were no longer going to be parents? If she had stayed in Pittsburgh, this wouldn't have happened. The car wouldn't be totaled, Scarlett wouldn't be lying here, and we would be parents by the end of the season.

I had fallen asleep, only waking when the nurses shuffled in to check Scarlett's vitals. After over 24 hours, she woke for a little bit and faded pretty quick. It was like that for most of the night and the next day. The doctors were confident that she would wake up, it was just a matter of time.

When she woke up, she could barely speak. I couldn't imagine the amount of pain she was in. It just made me hurt, honestly. The doctors came in to explain what had happened, including the miscarriage. Scarlett was hysterical and I didn't know what to do.

Her father told me to leave, get some fresh air and sleep. I needed it. With no idea how to comfort her, I was a wreck myself. All I wanted to do was crawl in bed and hold her. That wasn't possible, unfortunately. All I could do was hold her good hand and wait.

I had missed the first few days of camp, but was skating on my own early in the morning and at night whenever I had the chance to. The in-laws all told me to go, that she would want me to be with my team instead of waiting around in the hospital room, hoping to catch her few moments of consciousness before she fell back asleep.

It was a week before they let her go home. Her parents stayed with us, helping with the unpacking that we hadn't been able to do. Some of her friends came over from Pittsburgh and crashed on our couches. It was a hard time for us all. I had no idea what to do with the nursery or myself. I just wish that this had never happened and Scarlett wasn't in so much pain.

Scarlett's POV

"You can go home," they told me. "Your infection has gone away from the most part and you are healthy enough to leave."

My family was happy. No more uncomfortable chairs. No more of that bleach smell. No more wires and IV's hooked up to me. For all I cared, I could stay in there the rest of my life and be fine. 

When they told me that I had lost the babies, I was devastated. The pain didn't help. I screamed for hours until my voice gave out. I didn't eat so they had to give me a feeding tube, pumping in the nutrients my body needed to fight off infection and heal. Robert tried bribing me with oreo salad that he made. Very rarely would I eat it though.

Everyone was here, including Robert's parents and my sister. I guess when you get in a wreck and lose children, it's a big deal. Big enough to make everyone stop what they're doing and come see you.