It Is Forbidden

i. - an arrow to the noose

                                     It Is Forbidden – the tale of a Scottish Princess and a Viking outcast.

                                                                                               ~o0o~

       "But Mum, I told you, I don't wanna get married!" I whined again, this time tired and throwin' myself on the bed. But she didn't give up, like I'd hoped she would. Ever since that stupid archery competition for me hand, she's been perfectly content with lettin' me have my own way, and not be married off to some stranger. Until lately, when she suddenly started acting weird, and wantin' me to make my choice already. But I was not going to be married so soon. She just didn't understand that I'm still just a girl!
     "Merida, we've been over this. It's getting near your eighteenth birthday, I think by then you ought to be married." She folded another of my nighties and placed it on her pile, straightening her posture and pointing one finger at me. "But to the man of your choosing. Your father has invited the clan men and their sons back – " I made protest with a loud groaning noise and fell backwards, arms outstretched to the other side of me bed.
    " –Merida, none of this. I was saying, the clan men and their sons are coming, but also we've invited princes from other countries, and the clan men from farther regions." She finished, earning no kind of response from me. I didn't want to spend my eighteenth birthday swarmed by a bunch of desperate princes all tryin' to impress me with their social or otherwise skills. It just had no appeal. Especially the part where I had to choose a husband.
    "Augh, Mum. I told ya I don't want a husband, and I never will!" I exclaimed, sitting up in bed, hugging my bedpost, fingers subconsciously picking at the nicks made by my sword. She sighed visibly, to show me she was sick of my protests, to guilt trip me perhaps. I rolled my eyes, sighing too.
    "Merida." She said, coming to me with soft eyes. Ugh, I hated when she got like this, so hard to say no to. "Your father and I are only tryin' to do what's best for you. Believe me, at your age, I didn't want to be married either, and I hated your father at first." I chuckled at this part, I always found my parents to be total opposites, but their love for each other was strong and ran deep.
    "No lie?" I asked.
 She grinned. "No lie. He was so rude, and such a showoff you wouldn't believe!" We burst into laughter, hands clasped around each other's. "He once tried to impress me by shootin' an arrow at a target atop this very castle! He missed of course, and one of the other suitors decided to pull down his drawers to embarrass him further. He wouldn't speak to me for a week after that." I ceased my giggling and looked her square in the face, unsure if I had heard her correctly.
    "You had other suitors besides Da?" I questioned, curiosity rackin' my brain, I suddenly had an interest in her life as a young girl. I wondered if she could possibly have felt the way I did right now.

     "Aye." She nodded, standing up to reclaim her place by my dresser to put away the laundry. "I had three; there was your father o' course, then there was that one boy. He was – strange, to say the least. He had a dark heart, I know that for sure. He was dangerously cruel; I couldn't stand to be around him, especially alone. I was afraid o' him." She stared at the wall, subconsciously fingerin' the nightgown in her hands.
     "Who was the third?" I asked when she didn't continue.
 "What?" She returned as though she didn't understand.
      "You only named two, Da and the one you feared; who was the third?" I repeated. She got an amused look in her eyes, a devious smile playin' on her lips. "What?" I asked and swung around me bedpost. She chuckled and held my clothes up to put them away.
     "Why, he was Lord Dingwall." She finally answered, earning a gasp of total shock from me lips.
"No way! You're kiddin!" I squealed, like a wee lass. Mum laughed and shook her head, "No, he was one of me suitors. Obviously, though, I turned him down. Your father was a much better man, despite his flaws." She stared openly at the ceiling, traveling to a distant land of memories. I smiled, though I knew little of love, what I'd seen between my parents was definitely it. They had this connection that went beyond their differences; they argued a lot of course, because of their opposite personalities, but they seemed to show affection much more often. I knew Da loved Mum with all his heart, and she the same for him. If anything happened to either of them, the other would surely die of a broken heart. And that is what I was afraid of. What if one of those clan men turned out to be 'the one', and we did get married, and we loved each other so much we couldn't live without the other...I was terrified of that. Terrified that one day that person might die, or leave me, and I'd have already opened up me heart to them and couldn't just turn away. I'd be broken, and ruined. I did not want that kind of fate, one worse than death.
    "Well Merida, we should get going for dinner, and then you're free for the afternoon." Elinor broke into my thoughts, dragging me back to reality. "Really?" I gasped. She nodded, smiling.
     "Oh, thank you!" I screamed and threw me arms around her neck. She chuckled and we hurried to the door, opening it to find our maid and nanny standing there about to grasp the handle herself. "Oh, I just came to inform you that dinner is ready." Maudie murmured. Despite the fact that she'd practically raised us in these castle walls, she still felt uncomfortable talkin' to me Ma, who was royalty. Elinor's modulated laugh echoed in the hall as she grasped her stomach and placed a hand to Maudie's shoulder. "Of course it is dear, we were just coming." She looked at me and I followed, impatient to get to my free time. Free time was the one thing I really looked forward to most, perhaps I'd go for a long ride on Angus, I know he'd love that just as much as I would. Or maybe a stroll through town was in hand. Whatever I chose to do, it would be done excitedly.