Going Through Hell (Stiles Stilinki)

He Didn't Understand

His head ached so much.

As soon as Scott left, Stiles almost collapsed with the pain, what was going on with him?

The chanting in his head had stopped thankfully as soon as he had left.

"Stiles..."

It was his father, the sadness and grief on his face was clear, he knew his father must have heard everything.

Stiles dropped onto the couch, opting to glare at the television instead. Slowly the headache left him once more.

"Like it or not but you are from here, you should at least try-" The sheriff said softly.

"Try to what? Try and pretend I'm who they all think I am? Go to school with a happy fake smile and act like I-I haven't been through hell" He retorted bitterly.

His father frowned and asked slowly but kindly "Do you remember anything else of that place?"

The headache formed again as Stiles put his fingers to his temple, trying to sooth it.

"I remember screaming. I was in agony. I was trying to hold on to some words. I don't even remember why anymore" He said, his voice rough.

"He promised" His father said.

Stiles tensed, a shudder running through his body.

"You were saying it in your sleep" The sheriff told him.

Stiles clenched his fingers around the couch, tightening his grip but shoulders sagging "What is that even meant to mean?"

The Sheriff didn't answer him, both their confusion was clear, Stiles knew there must be something more to these words for them to be echoing around in his head whenever something or someone reminded him of hell.

"Do you think I was torchered?" He then asked, this time his voice going back to his more bland monotone.

His father winced a little at Stiles change in voice and behavior, he hated this new part of Stiles, at least he had been showing emotion before, this side of him made he feel like a complete stranger in his eyes.

Stiles said, thinking it through "I hear those words in my head sometimes but its me saying them but-no, not saying them, I'm screaming them. And my voice sounds like I was in deep pain. Agony even. Like someones tearing me to pieces slowly-"

"Stop" His father snapped.

He blinked then frowned as he saw how pale the Sheriff looked, his eyes wide, no blood in his face.
He hadn't been that descriptive had he? Odd, the Sheriff didn't seem like the type of person who would be squimish.

He voiced his thoughts but if anything his father paled even more.

"But you were describing yourself being torchured!" His father snapped.

Stiles blinked at him confused.

"Stiles..." The Sheriff said shakily, not believing his son didn't understand why him describing what could have happened to him, what probably did happen to him, despite being no scars, would be very upsetting for the Sheriff to hear.

He could imagine Stiles pained screams in his head now. He should have protected Stiles better, its his fault this had happened! If he hadn't been so stupid...Stiles was all he had....

"Why are you crying?" His son wondered.

"Because I'm upset" Stiles father sighed.

"Why?" Stiles asked and it sounded like a normal curious question out of context.

The sheriff blinked, unsure how to respond but finally he asked him "What-what do you feel towards me Stiles?"

He blinked and said slowly "You're my father..."

"No, not that. We both know that. What do you feel towards me?' The Sheriff asked.

Stiles frowned but looked a little shaky "I-I don't understand"

"You have emotions, they're just not showing up as much, but you felt something towards Scott back then. That was anger Stiles. Do you have any emotions connected to me?" His father asked, trying to keep his own emotions out of his voice. 

Stiles started at his father, once he understood the question, what did he feel about him? He...didn't know. He'd felt sorry he couldn't remember  but was that because he cared or because he didn't but wished he did?

Stiles answered honestly "I don't know. I..just don't know" 

The Sheriff took a breath at that, well he supposed it was better than Stiles telling him he didn't have any emotions for him at all. Why did this happen? Why his son?

"Well, you'll have to figure that out" He said softly.

Stiles nodded slowly.

Wanting to change the subject the Sheriff asked something else he'd wanted to ask, since Stiles had got back "Anyway I wanted to ask you something, not now, when ever you feel ready, however what do you remember about School?"