My STUPID Journal

if i were to die...

i mean this in a suicide sort of way

ok so first i would steal my phone, charge it to 100%, and then run away with my charger plus all my money plus money i stole from my parents

then id go to a small town somewhere in maryland with a giant bridge

spray print a giant penis on the bridge

sign it

buy a starbucks

text my friend @apercaderps some shit and then say im going to die today and that making cupcakes with her that one time was cool

text another friend @iamnoone11 so other shit and tell her at my funeral i want everyone to wear colorful clothing cuz black is boring and that i want a neon blue tombstone cuz thats awesome as shit

id then call her, just in case she can talk me out of it, tell her some cheesy quote from a&o (the average and the oddity made by someone who i forgot their username. its in my reading list) and then jump of the bridge screaming "THE MONEY IS HIDDEN IN-" then die so i could have a lot of people just wondering what the fxck was going on

also im going to make a will just in case this does happen (if this did happen then id die the coolest way) so that could pretty much give away all my shit

oh and i want velvet cake at my funeral and dipndots

also i only want 10 people there, no priest cuz fxck religious people, and then i want to wear a black sickly dress that as sleeves that are small at the shoulders then get bigger as they go down to my hands. and it needs to go down to my feet. i guess it'll kind of look like a night gown

AND THATS IT