18 Days // C.R

Chapter 10

JENS POV
"So why did he want to meet you so urgently?" My older sister says. She looks interested in what happened. I think it's because she's a romantic and I haven't communicated with a guy since sophomore year. But I have a pretty good reason why I get nervous with males.

"I forgot that I left my phone with him." I quickly lie and rush into my room almost slamming the door.

I take my hair out of my ponytail and shake my head, all my red strands going everywhere. I look at my sleeping daughter slightly snoring.

I shake my head smiling and head to take a shower. Once I look in the mirror I see that the red from blushing so much hasn't gone away. I frown as I adjust the water to my choice of temperature.

You know how some people sing or dance in the shower? Well I think. I think too much and too deep in a situation.

As the water relaxes my tense body I can't help but replay the events that happened in the last hour. It wasn't a passionate kiss, it was simple, quick, and sweet. It lasted about twenty seconds, and it was very simple nothing much to read in it.

But what if there was something to read in it? As I thought that thought, I touched my lips. I still sense his lips there. I shake my head trying to wipe away my thoughts of how I felt about it.

Maybe I'm thinking to much. I mean people kiss all the time right? Yeah it was nothing, just two people who were sad at the moment. God with the water surrounding me it's like I'm drowning in my thoughts.

I think it was sweet that he had a picture of his dead girlfriend. Wow I probably should've worded that better but it was like a tribute to her. I then think of how he made the first move. God, my mind is going everywhere. 
I finally allow myself to admit that I did felt something. This is going to fast, I only met him like three days ago. I don't even know him. I shouldn't have let him kiss me, I knew I would regret it. 

I decide to leave my deep thinking until later and wash my hair and body. After the shower I dry myself and put on my pjs, which are actually running shorts and a big shirt. I do the usual bedtime routine which includes brushing my teeth, taking off my makeup etc.

I push the bathroom door but it wouldn't budge. Confused I try again and again. I realize it was a pull door. I face palm and pull the door realizing its a pull door. What bathroom has a pull door? 

I see a figure right when I open the door and try to hide my startled expression. "Robin?" I question and try to look on the dark room. "Yup and you have explaining to do" she answers and pushes me back into the bathroom and shuts the door behind her.

"I know you had your phone with you, how would you know he needed you at the deck?" She says quickly and she knows she has me cornered. Her lips turn into a smirk and green eyes sparkle with excitement, like she knows what happened.

"Robin," I sigh and begin to tell her the whole story. I'm surprised she didn't interrupt like she usually does, but after I tell her the story that's where the storm comes.

"Jen! How could you tell him! Y'all haven't known each other for when half a week!" She almost shouts with disappoint. We agreed not to tell anyone that Marlee was mine, her idea. I know it's stupid and I'm perfectly fine with the judgement because they don't know what happened. But Robin cares to much for what people think, that's the one thing I dislike about her. Plus she's my baby not hers.

"I know, it's just he told me his story and I felt like it. Plus it's my story to tell not yours." I spit out harshly. I know Robin has good intentions but what I'm saying is true. I'm 19, I'm an adult I could do whatever I want.

She sighs and pulls me into a hug, which lasts longer than I expected. "You know I want the best for you right?" She says with sincere eyes.
She rests for hands on my shoulders as I nod.

"Wait, you two kissed." She says remembering the ending of the story. I nod without making eye contact.

"Jen! You haven't had a guys attention in years!" She says, and it kinda hurts my feelings but I know it's true. Whenever a guy approaches me I push them away, which they do. But for some odd reason Chandlers different. I don't know why but I guess I'll find out sooner or later.

"I don't know what's happening but I'm going to get soon sleep." I say, I really don't want to talk about it. I don't know why, I find myself frowning but I don't adjust my lips.

Robin seems to notice my frown and gets my attention. "Jennifer," she says with a pause then continues,"I know your scared, but I'm tried of you just existing." I look at her confused. Very confused. Did she just admit she wants me to die? My brows furrow but Robin smiles for a second and continues to finish her statement.

"Jen, your existing. But are you really living?" She says and runs my upper arms before leaving the room, leaving me to absorb everything.

I sigh and walk over to my bed. Still having the sulking face I had when I was in the bathroom, I fall asleep. My thoughts are going crazy, like the Atlanta airport. I have a sense of what's going to happen next, but I fear of what can happen that my mind doesn't dare try to comprehend.

I can't believe this one boy can equal a thousand feelings. A thousand thoughts.