Just for her. {Two fanfictions in one.}

Break up struggles

Spencer's P.O.V

I have survived day three post-Toby, luckily he hasn't come into work his probably kissing Leila. I haven't ate in days, the last thing I ate was a yogurt and a banana for lunch, I have set a routine: wake,work,cry,sleep. Well, try to sleep I can't even escape him in my dreams.

I take a deep breath hoping he isn't in today, I can't see him, not now it's to early I know I'll break down. The thought of him kissing Leila kills me.

I slide out the cab and I make my way inside the building, once I'm in the reception there's no sign of Toby I let out a little sigh and I head over to Claire, she's the only one who knows about our break-up she's been really supportive, I haven't seen Hanna to tell her but I really want her company.

Spencer: his not in right?

Claire: (giggling) nope! Your oka-

Her face drops. She stops speaking and looks at the door, I turn my head swiftly.

Shit, shit. Toby is here and his not alone, why the fuck is Leila with him?! I'm holding everything inside, the tears, the anger, the frustration, I can't believe he brought her here.

He catches me looking at him, I quickly look down, he whispers something in her ear and a faint smile forms on her lips, the jealousy inside me is boiling, and I can't do anything about it, his not mine anymore.

Spencer: (quietly) Claire I'm going to be in my room okay?

I walk past him not giving him any eye contact I make my way to the lift, hoping no ones in there, I don't know how I'm going to stop myself crying.

Ping.

The lift opens thank god, no ones here, I make my way inside and press number 3. Just as the doors were closing someone puts there hands in. I can recognise these hands from a mile it's Toby's. The doors open back up again and Toby makes his way inside the lift, the doors shut close.

The tension, the love, the electricity between us is flowing in the air, but we remain silent, I want to ask him, ask him why he brought her here, are they together? Does she love him? I quickly dismiss the thoughts there too painful.

Toby presses the stop button on the lift, I look at him confused.

Spencer: what are you doing?

Toby: we need to talk.

Spencer: there's nothing to talk about.

Toby: Spencer, I know you feel the same way about me and I'm not ready to loose you.

Spencer: you already lost me when you kissed her.

Toby: Spencer I told you I was drunk it was a stupid mistake, but I couldn't leave her out in the cold.

Spencer: so you would rather leave me out in the cold?

Toby: no Spence. It's you over anyone, I've missed looking into your big hazel eyes,
I missed your scent, I missed touching you, kissing you, being able to tell everyone your mine, Spencer I need you so much.

Spencer: why did you bring her here?

Toby: she's my secretary, but only temporarily, she wanted to make money and she felt bad for coming between us.

Spencer: she felt bad? Right and the way to make it up is by being closer to you, smart.

Toby: look Spencer just hear-

Spencer: can you just get the lift working I'm done taking, Leila's probably waiting for you.

I press the start button on the lift and wait for the lift to start up, 5 minutes later were on floor 3 , I get out the lift and make my way to my room.

I walk as fast as I can to my room holding back the tears holding back everything. Once I'm in I shut the door behind me, and I slowly fall on the ground, weeping.

I can't do this, I can't bare to see him everyday I can't see him with her I can't take it, it's too much, I'm trying so hard to be strong I'm holding back every bone and muscle in my body to stop me from running back into his arms. I just want to run back to him and tell him I need you just as much, I missed your scent, your big blue eyes which I could stare into for hours, your hold, your kisses, god I miss you!

Crying for nearly 10 minutes I talk my self out of it, telling myself I need to stop doing this, I deserve better,but everyone knew he was too good for me, I just couldn't see it because I was so I love with him I would sacrifices anything.

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I haven't come out my office since I've seen Toby, I haven't even spoken to anyone nor have I ate, I'm tried, I'm lost, Everytime I think about the memories we shared I start to cry, my mind goes off to another place and i-

Mark: Spencer can you hand the case study 3 to mr. Cavanaugh?

He scared me, well I guess I have to give this study to, wait what? Who? No, please no I can't see him again, please.

I ring him back.

Spencer: mark can you send someone else to Toby?

Mark: Spencer I need this done now. Hurry please.

The line goes dead. I pick up the folder and head out the door, here goes nothing.

Half way down the corridor my eye catches something, I turn my head swiftly to see what it was-

Shit. It's jack.