They saved me, then they broke me...

Chapter 17

Kate's POV-

I woke up in the loving arms of my boyfriend. After a full day of watching movies, snuggling and occasionally stealing a sweet kiss or two with Louis, I was in a great mood. Today was the day, the day all the boys flew to their homes for a full year, to spend time with their family's and just have a rest of the tour life. The day I go back to my flat, alone. Well that's what bound to happen, what else would happen? Nothing. I don't know how I'm gonna go through with this pregnancy alone, usually the girl would have a boyfriend/husband to help, or even parents and friends. But I have neither of those, well I have Louis, but he's going to England, so I'm gonna be alone. I'll probably fall back not my depressive stage, which has gotten much better over the past week because of all the boys and Paul. But with them gone, and me going back into my old lifestyle, it's bound to happen. Wow this sounds sad, it's okay everyone, put away your violins! Lets just enjoy, however much time I have left with Louis and the others. I look over at Louis who's still asleep, his arms wrapped around me like his life depends on it. I see someone's shadow pass the door, so I call out to them. I may as well have someone's company, cause I'm pretty sure I'm not getting out of Louis's hold till he wakes up. Then in pops Niall's head in the doorway? "What's up?" He walks in and sits on the end of the bed, eating a breakfast wrap. When is this boy not eating food? "Nothing much, I'm kind of stuck here, and I need some company" I smile at him. "Well, can I for one just say that you and Louis are the cutest thing I've ever had the pleasure to watch!" He smirked. "Thanks Niall, you and Liam are pretty adorable too!" I wink and he goes red, avoiding eye contact. Almost like its true. "Oh my god. Niall, are you- are you and Liam, together?!" I get excited, I always was I Niam shipper. "Pf, what n-no" he looks away scratching the back of his head. " wow Niall, that was real convincing, may as well have just said 'we fucked last night, but no one knows!' " I chuckle, and Niall stiffens. "No-" I open my eyes in shock. "Are you kidding me?!" I finish grinning big at him. "Don't tell anyone you know, even Liam, okay!!" He pleaded worriedly. "I would never, oh my god Niall that is soo cute!" I fangirled. He just blushed and hid his head in his hands. "I'm glad Louis's asleep!" he finally spoke, i gave him a confused look then he continued. "its just i don't know how to tell the other three, if they would judge me. Or maybe they would hate me and i cant take a chance like that" he looked sadly into the distance. Oh my god. He pretty much just explained my situation, now i feel absolutely terrible for lying to everyone. Today is the day, i have to tell them. Maybe i should test it out on Niall. "I know exactly how you feel, I've been hiding a secret from all of you. And I'm not proud of it at all. I was just ashamed of myself. I didn't want you guys to run away, to judge me like everyone else has.." I look Niall in the eyes. He looked sad, worried and sympathetic all at  the same time. "What is it, you can tell me i promise, i wont judge you. Plus you kinda owe it to me, you know mine and Liam's secret!" He smiled awkwardly. "um, where do i start. Well first of all, I'm not Liam's cousin,  that's the lie that he told. He found me unconscious outside the backstage door at the Sydney concert. I was meant to go there, i had backstage passes and everything. But i almost over dosed on cocaine. I'm just a waitress, i live in a flat on my own. And i have depression. I have no friends, my family ignores me. And yeah, that's it i guess. Liam just thinks i got drugged in a cafe, that's why he lied for me, cause i asked him to, Paul's the only one who knows, and now you...." i get out, and look at Niall, who's mouth is wide open. "oh my god. I'm so sorry Kate. That's terrible!" He lent in for a hug, but realized i was already being hugged by a sleeping Louis. "Kate, we wont hate you, you should tell everyone!" He spoke all serious. "I know Niall, I just, i don't know how to tell them all something like that, i don't think i can..." I snuggled into Louis more. Because it might be the last time. "well i really have to pee, so i'll be back" He went to get up but was stopped when i spoke. "No Niall, go see Liam and the others. I'll be fine!" I smiled. He smiled greatfully and walked away. I turn around to to face Louis, only to see his eyes open, and his facial expression, readless.

He had herd Niall and I talking the whole time. So now he know's that Niall's gay with Liam. And he know's my story too. "Kate why didnt you tell me?" We are now sitting on the bed, with the door shut and talking about it. "Because, after i was diagnosed, i told my family, and my friends. And you know what they did? They left me. The just stopped making the effort to try and help me, they never wanted to see me or be around me. The last year of high school was hell. I sat by myself, had no friends, No family to consult it. So i turned to cutting and drugs. And I-, I just wanted to be liked by someone. I'm a really big fan of your band, and if, if you guys did the same, then that's it. There would be nothing  left to live for, and that scared me. I just wanted someone to like me." The tears were now pouring down my face. I couldn't even look Louis in the eye, but when i did, He was crying too. He just sat there, looking at me, crying. Suddenly the door burst open and in came Niall, Liam, Zayn and Harry. "i told them, i could see how hard it was for you, so i did" Niall came over and hugged me. "We were going to come see if you were alright, but we stopped at the door when we herd you and Louis talking. And i just want to tell you now, that's we wouldn't judge you Kate, And we still love you just the same." Liam hugged me too. He looked slightly flustered, so I'm guessing Niall told him i know. I gave him a look as if to say, 'your secrets safe with me!'. Then they all left. It was once again just Louis and I. His eyes were red and puffy. "I cant believe it" he looked like he was going to cry again. Oh my god, he's going to break up with me. I was about to start crying at the thought. "Kate.." He dragged on "Its okay, i understand that you don't wan to be with me anymore, I'm use to it, a-" I was cut off by Louis laughing. "what?" i ask, I'm so confused right now, i she really being that shallow?! "Kate, I was going to ask if you wanted to come back to England with me, meet my family.." he looked all nervous. "Oh my god! Of course! I would love to!" I jump over and attack him with a big hug and kisses. "I love you so much Kate! And i always will. It doesn't matter about what you did in the past, I'm your future now, and i will do everything in mt power to make sure you never feel that way again! But promise me now, no more secrets. Even if your ashamed of them, i will never judge you" He had my hands in his, something he tended to do when he really wanted to get the point across to me.

Later that day we got to the airport, boarded the plane, and were on our way to London. I was so excited, this is not what i thought would happen. Especially after this morning's events. I made the boys promise that they wouldn't treat me any differently. I don't want their sympathy, i just want things to continue the way they've been going. All of us being happy together and being friends, well, some of us a little more then friends. I look down at Louis's and I's hands intertwined, and i dont think Ive ever been happier. Its like there's been a huge weight that's been taken off my back. Now i don't have to watch what i say and do, i can be the real me, but the thing that scares me is, what if no one likes the real me? What if we get to London, and Louis's mum doesn't like me, then he will dump me, and i'll have to fly back to australia by myself. I don't even know why I'm worrying so much, i guess its just cause i care so much. I mean if Joanna doesn't like me, i would probably die. Not literally, i would just be very upset. "Kate are you okay? It looks like your thinking way to hard!"  I turn to see Louis, as he squeezed my hand a little. "Just thinking, about meeting you mum and sisters." I smile nervously. "She's gonna love you baby! They all will." He pecked my cheek. "Thanks Louis" i rest my head on his shoulder. We're at least three quarters of the way their, and that makes me so much more nervous. I just really hope that they like me!!