Remember Me?

Kill Me (10)

(!! THIS CHAPTER HAS TRIGGERING FEATURES PLS DON'T READ IF YOU GET TRIGGERED I CARE ABOUT YOUR SAFETY BEFORE I CARE ABOUT MY BOOK !!)

Chloe's POV

For the love of God. All I wanted was a healthy child and this is what I get. I'm still gonna love her with all my heart. It just hurts, you know? To have just gone through birth and hours with your child being the healthiest it could be, and to have that stolen from you? It sucks. I don't know how I'm going to be able to stay at home in bed for a few weeks. I won't be able to survive like that.

...

When we got checked out of the hospital, I was still not talking. I couldn't cry, I had no tears left. No one truly understood how I felt. "She'll be fine. She's still in shock." I've gotten over the shock in all honesty. I just don't want anything to do with anyone or anything. I just want my baby to be healthy. I don't want Ashton, he keeps trying to comfort me, and I just feel like I'm hurting him because all I do is shove him off of me.

Ashton's POV

Why won't she talk to me? Is it really still a shock to her? I mean I'm really pissed about my child being unhealthy but we can have another baby, I can't get another person in the world like Chloe. I have to make sure both of my princesses are safe, but I can only be in one place at a time. They're taking Taylor back to where no one can visit her for a week or so, so my top priority is Chloe. "Baby, do you want to stop by to get lunch before we get home?" She continued to stare out the window, not answering me. "Babe? Please. You haven't talked or ate since the nurse told you about Taylor, you need to be hungry. Please eat, this isn't healthy for you." She just shook her head and started crying. Shit.

...

Chloe's POV

Once we finally got home, Ashton told me he was gonna go pick up some McDonalds and that he'd be back later. The perfect opportunity. He kissed me on the forehead and left. I waited until I saw that the car was down the street before I did it. Even though I was alone, I still didn't talk.

All of this is pointless.

I'm never gonna get my baby girl back.

She's probably already gone, the doctors just don't want to inform me in my fragile state.

I pulled out my phone and sent a text out to Ashton and my family and friends.

Me: I love you guys so so much I'm so glad that you've been apart of my life I don't know what I'd do without you. I'm so sorry I've disappointed everyone so many times. I've fucked up, I've made mistakes. I know I can't take them back. But those mistakes made me who I am today. I'm sorry to say this, but today will be my last day here. All the shit that's been happening lately is just too much for me to handle. I'm deciding to cut myself from your lives so you don't get anymore attached than you would be in the future. If Taylor does happen to live through this, tell her I love her to death and when she's older, tell her I'm not around because I was in a car crash or something. I hope she grows up to be the most beautiful girl in the world and I love you all very much. Please forgive me. This is my final goodbye. X Chloe

I rushed up to the bathroom before I could read any responses and tried to decide what to do first. I pulled open the medicine cabinet and grabbed every bottle and razor blade we had. I sat my phone on the counter and started to open every bottle. I started letting the sink run, running my now bleeding wrists under the freezing cold water to numb the pain. My phone wouldn't stop vibrating while I filled my cup with water so I could down these goddamn pills. I curled in a ball on the floor and reached for one of the open bottles.

Ashton burst through the door, making me jump and immediately start crying. He saw everything. The cuts, the blood, the bottles, the cup. He immediately screamed and fell to his knees as I slowly blacked out from blood loss.

(aAA sorry if you read this and got triggered but I made a clear warning at the top so it's on you. Tyler Oakley turned 27 yesterday I wasn't reading okay keep commenting and voting &&&&&&&&&&& please share with friends because I hit 300 reads and it'd be hella cool if i could hit 1k ;^) thanks bye)