Our Two Hearts Beat As One- The fantastic foursome

Chapter 3

A/N:

so umm.. next week I'm returning to school from summer vacation and after a week there is a holiday and after a few days of learning there's another holiday. anyway, I'll try to write and post before returning from school but I can't promise any thing ;)

Chris POV:

"See you next week!" I said to Dan and Phil while get in my taxi with Pj.
He's not living in London so he stays in my place for the night.
He comes over every "Eating-and-watch-movies-but-most-of-all-eating Friday" but I always excited because it's the only time that I can worry about him out loud.
"So Pj.." I said, turning around to him. "How's life?" "Ummm.. Well.. You know.." Pj said biting his lips.
Uh oh. If he's biting his lips it's mean that he met someone new.
it's never good.
"Pj." I said staring at him.
"Did you me-"
I didn't finish because I remembered we were in a taxi.
"We'll talk when we'll get home." I said still looking at Pj.
He looked so scared and lost like eight years old boy who can't find his mum..
I hope he didn't starting getting to old habits again because he looked more terrified than ever. and he looked so unhealthy.
Maybe that's because he didn't ate for months and when he ate he puked everything later.
I was really really worried about him.
His anxiety worried me even more when it comes to society.
I remember when he started crying in the middle of the shop because he was too scared asking for help.
i hope he's okay and it's just another person who stared at him in the street or something.
The taxi stopped and I paid the driver.
When we got the apartment I sat on the couch and Pj sat next to me.
"Tell me what's wrong." I said.
"Ummm.. Well.. You remember when you told me that I need to find someone to talk too.."
"Yes I do." I said.
"So.. I found someone.." He said looking up at me.
"That's great! How is this someone?" "Oh she is great!" He said smiling.
"She? Wow Pj!" I said. Faking a smile.
"Yeah! She is really nice and beautiful and she just perfect!" Pj said.
He sounds in love. Nahhh.. That's Pj!
He didn't had a crush since 8th grade.
"Wow Pj that's amazing! Good luck with her!" I said faking another smile
"so why you look so sad?"
"Because," he said looking straight into my eyes, "I'm scared that ill do something wrong and I'll lose her."
I could see the fear tears coming to his eyes.
I hugged him and I could feel his tears falling on my shirt but it didn't bother me at all.
"Pj," I said letting go of him.
"you are one of the most wonderful human being I've ever met in my entire life and you never done something that hurt someone." He sobbed.
"Well.. Except yourself. And now it's the time to let go from the past. I hope that girl will help you and be smart enough to see how lovely and amazing you are. Because you are amazing." I said looking at his eyes.
All of the sudden he hugged me.
But not our normal "supporting hug". A real hug.
Like there's feelings from both of the sides.
I didn't wanted to let go but I needed to go to the shower.
Without saying something from fear Pj will see or hear my tears I ran to the bathroom and opened the water, without taking my clothes off, so no one can hear me crying over the sounds of the water.
I was hurt.
"Why do you feel hurt you stupid piece of shit?" He said.
"He was never belong to you and guess what? He will never be!"
"No," I whispered. "Shut up."
"You ugly and fat freak! You don't understand? Pj will never be with you!"
"No stop it!" I said.
"Ugh you are the most awful person I've ever seen."
"Stop it!" I screamed and fell on the floor crying like I've never cried before.
"I'll tell you why Pj will never be with you.." He said.
"Please" I said looking up at him "please just stop."
"He will never be with you because you are the most useless human being on this planet. You are stupid and ugly and fat and worthless. Yes, that what you are, a little hopeless and fucked up piece of nothing." He said looking up at me.
I can't fight him.
Clearly he is stronger than me.
I beaded him once, but I can't do it again. I drowned my demons once, since then they learned how to swim.

After fifteen minutes being in the shower, fighting with the monster inside my head Pj knocked on the door and ask if I was okay.
"Yeah I'm fine ill get out in a minute." I was not fine. Nothing was fine. I needed to win this monster. Make it go away and leave me alone. All the things that demon say is true.. I am a fat and ugly and useless piece of shit. I am.
"What took you so long?" Pj asked when I got out of the shower.
"Oh, you know, the thoughts of life.." I said and Pj smiled.
I like that feeling when I make someone smile. Specially Pj. It just make me feel so happy.
Pj got into the shower and I crushed on my bed. Feeling tired and breath heavily. I guess that this mind fight make me weaker and weaker every time. I looked up to the photos on my wall. Here is me and Phil laughing about something and here's me and Dan playing videos game, here is me with Pj hugging like in every photo we ever had. Here picture of Dan and Pj and Phil with Pj and Dan and Phil together. And the biggest picture was four of us.Smiling to the camera. We were really happy. I smiled to the photo and turned around, lying with my back to the photos. 

After five minutes I fell asleep.

If there's any problems with the grammar or something wrong with the story please let me know XXX