yO THIS MIGHT BE TRIGGERING TO SOME SORRY FRENS
why do i feel like this is a diary.
sigh
ive taken at least 2 online mental health assesments. i kniw people dont belive in them or thwy think that the test are fake and the answers are rigged. ive went to the most professional websites i could find.the only thing that im clinically diagnosed with is ptsd from childhood. ive taken these atleast twice to three times and the results got slightly worse.
(these results are from the second or 3rd time ive taken taken the test)
the things that i test positive for are
major depressive disorder 93/100 positive
manic episodes disorder 57/100
ptsd 87/100 positive
bipolar disorder 100/100 positive
general anxiety disorder 100/100 positive
panic disorder 81/100
panic attacks 79/100
may be at risk for an eating disorder
honestly this scares me that ive goten to such state. it horrifies me to an extent but really? why should my own mind scare me so much. it brings me to tears really. i never know when im.going to snap or break in half and i cant deal with it. im supposed to be getting help soon but fuck soon isnt now and i feel as if i deserve the help i need now. im honestly tearing in half and i have no idea why it got to this point. i honestly have nightmares about dying or suicide. i cant let myself get to a point like that again and shit man i need help professionally. maybe go to a fucking rehabilitation center for the help i need because fuck im so bad. i used to neve think id be anywhere positive to bipolar and i got 100/100 the third time.ive taken the test. i honestly feel so.fucking fucked up. im.not good enough.
other than that schpeel i have guitar tomorrow whoOP
YOU ARE READING
welcome to my mind
Humor*i always put a tw just in case i say something triggering* Chase all about the adventures of an mentally unstable queer kid.
