welcome to my mind

idunevncure

tw proobly

inderects
- you make me wanna drink blech oh my god. you make me out to be this big fucking dick and that i dont care but you! dont! know! whats! wrong! with! me! im really fucking mad at you. dont fucking whine to me.if youre gonna be a dick to me and.fucking being up your girlfriend every .2 seconds. i will fucking get sick of it. youre always all over her and i can tell that she! doesnt! like! it!! uAHG. also stop making me out to be a fucking idiot you know i have dyslexia fuckingdick

-i love you bud and that may be gay but fuck it youre my favorite kiddo rn atm btw tbh.

-youre pretty cool too but u forgot al so...

jk jk jk youre my best friend i love you m8ty moo

- stop! being! problematic! pls!

- god i think i like you again but idc anymore

ah now tht that shit storm is over

i feel isolated now more than ever
i just wanna uGHDSHJSMSKD.DKSDLSSIDLDDLIPSKDPE
i dont understand why i put myself in these situations

i wanna shoot myself

i dont want to be the.fucking bassist i didnt fuckibg sign up for bass lessonsin fucking june/july
i signed up for guitar
not! bass!
just cause i can play it doesnt mean i want to be a bassist.
just because i talked about songs i can jam out to on bass
doesn't!
mean!
i!
wanna!
be!
a!
bassist!

i play guitar guitar is what i do its who i am
i dont fucking stand around and look fucking bored all the time
i wanna shred !

fuck you kid you havent seen me on guitar
stop flirting w me too
i could be gay you fucking cocnut crusted moldy donut

i hate myself so much

i feel isolated hopeless blamed and fucking stupid
im more jumpy than ever
i want to break my wrist

but im not cause fuck that

im also on a trip thats been planned for like almost a year and a half and i dont know if i can play the last show

the other guitar teacher makes me out to be a selfish bitch

FIRST OF ALL FUCKHEAD YOU HAVE A MASTERS FUCKING DOCTORS BULLSHIT DEGREE IN FUCKINH PSYCOLOGY YOU SHOULD KNOW A MENTALLY UNSTABLE PERSON WHEN YOU SEE THEM
SECOND OF ALL I KNOW YOU DONT LIKE ME
FUCK YOU
also stop fucking around with the song
you dont fucking do that to someone who fucking knows the song inside and out
okay im done w that

ive just been really mad and irritated and if i fucking talk to someone im scared ill yell at them and start crying

i feel musically drained
monday-practice 4 guitar
tuesday- practice 4 guitar
wednesday- band practice
thursday- practice 4 guitar
friday- lessons
saturday- practice
sunday- practice

basically my week lined out

when i get things in copious amounts - even of its.music i want to strangle myself

i've been assigned someone for the mental health assesment(s)
thats good news
so we will probably get a call hopefully before monday

i want to strangle myself

i bought a bra at the dollar store and its horrible bc i have melons and now im wearing 2 bras bc the thing doseNT GIVE ME SUPPORT AND I NEED THAT

this whole day has not been great 4 me

i really want to have a reset button so bad

just reset every bad thing in my life so that i can get eveything right

but nothing goes right for me

ugHH

i honestly havent felt suicidal in so long i thought i was better

also @ the guy that has his cuts as his lock and home screen pls dont do that cause i will get triggered

i want to fucking just

honestly i want to break my fucking leg

i bit a kid today and the mark was still there for almost 3 hours.

i havent posted daily and that makes me so wtf is wrong w me

also i pretty much live off of fish cashews trail mix and vegan gluten-free school chips

so close to being vegan i can taste the lettuce
joking joking

but ive lost weight and that makes me happy v v much.
my pants are baggy and ny shirts are baggy and w my sweats at p.e i have to tighten them so they stay on its great

i also feel energized ironically

p.e doesnt suck as bad but fuck the mile im not doing that shit at all

i also feel like im going to cry

it sucks
but uh yeah